


orbit

by tatoeba



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-18
Updated: 2016-12-26
Packaged: 2018-08-23 03:56:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 27,621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8313121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tatoeba/pseuds/tatoeba
Summary: Chanyeol doesn't expect to wake up to find someone's name on the inside of his right wrist, not when he already has Kyungsoo's name etched onto his left.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> ohhh boy!! i started this fic over a year ago and it was inspired by some prompt on a soulmates au post on tumblr that i've long since lost. chankaisoo have been my ot3 since forever and i've always wanted to write something for them and this is what happened lmao
> 
> pls be aware that this fic is not completed. i have ~30k written but i've been stuck for a couple of months. i thought posting this might help me get back into the groove. i have four chapters all ready to go and will probably post them once a week? i haven't quite figured that out yet. 
> 
> honestly idk where the title came from this isn't space au lol but for some reason it feels fitting to me so here we are!
> 
> anyway. this fic is kinda like my baby so i really hope you enjoy it if you read. T__T thank you T__T

The burning hot sensation on the inside of his wrist is something Chanyeol has only felt once before, about three years ago. Like then, it wakes him up early in the morning in the middle of July; the sky is still dark outside and the clock on the table on Chanyeol’s left reads 4:15AM. He groggily rolls over onto his side, trying to fight the weird feeling away and return to sleep, but the heat only grows, uncomfortable, until Chanyeol can’t do anything but submit to it. 

He reaches across the bed to tug on the lamp beside the alarm, blinking a few time as his eyes adjust to the brightness. On his left, Kyungsoo makes a soft, grumbling sound, brows furrowing as he curls up in bed. Chanyeol watches him fondly for a moment, until he remembers why he’s awake in the first place, and he lifts his right hand up to his face. 

There, etched on the inside of his wrist is a name that definitely didn’t exist when he went to bed. “W-What?” he breathes, feeling suddenly like he’s been doused in ice cold water. His wrist keeps burning hot despite it. 

He rubs at the name a few times with his fingers, as if to check if it’s real and Kyungsoo isn’t playing some kind of trick on him, to make him _think_ that he has--

The name doesn’t come off. It doesn’t smudge. It sits there, in perfect, precise letters, and stares up at him as if wondering why Chanyeol won’t believe it. 

“Kyungsoo,” he breathes again, reaching out to shake his boyfriend awake. His _soulmate_. Because he already has one. Kyungsoo. Whose name is written on Chanyeol’s left wrist and has been there for just over three years. “Kyungsoo, wake up. Wake the fuck up.” 

“ _What_ ,” Kyungsoo snaps tiredly, pulling the blankets down so he can glare up at Chanyeol, and even then, with his ridiculous bed hair and tired eyes, Chanyeol thinks he looks too cute to actually be menacing at all. 

“ _Look_ ,” he says, focusing back on the issue at hand, as he thrusts his wrist into Kyungsoo’s face. 

Kyungsoo, clearly taken aback, leans away slightly and squints at his skin. It takes him a moment, because Kyungsoo’s eyesight is terrible and he’s only just woken up anyway, but then realization dawns on his face, eyes widening as he lowers Chanyeol’s hand and looks at him. 

“Oh,” he says, sounding small. Kyungsoo never sounds small. Chanyeol’s heart sinks slowly to his stomach as he looks down at the new name on his wrist. His new soulmate, _Jongin Kim_.

 

Chanyeol can’t stop staring at the new name. He’d tugged on a long-sleeved shirt that morning despite temperatures predicting highs in the 90s to hide the name as well as he could, but he still finds himself pushing up his sleeve to look at it whenever he has a free moment to spare. 

It’s not unheard of, people having more than one soulmate. There are people who have new soulmates, maybe after an original relationship doesn’t work out and the name fades away, or maybe due to loss and death. Chanyeol knows there are people who have multiple soulmates at once, too, people who get both names at the same time when they’re teenagers, and people like him, now, who discover a second soulmate later in life. 

Chanyeol never once thought he would have a second soulmate. He doesn’t think he _needs_ a second soulmate. He loves Kyungsoo, had been hopelessly infatuated with him for a year before his name ever appeared on Chanyeol’s wrist, and he doesn’t need this Jongin Kim to come and ruin everything that the two of them have built together in the past three years. 

“Don’t,” Kyungsoo says later that day, when they’re both home after work and Kyungsoo is pulling the tie off from around his neck. “You know it doesn’t work like that.” 

“I don’t care,” Chanyeol says, petulantly. He even crosses his arms, and feels himself deflate only a little when Kyungsoo cracks a fond little smile at his childishness. “I love you. I don’t want anyone else.” 

“You have to find him,” Kyungsoo says. He looks like he’s been thinking about this all day, too, eyes a little resigned. “You have to meet him, at least.” When Chanyeol still frowns at him, Kyungsoo sighs, running a hand through his hair and then stepping up to him, sliding his hands up his arms. “It’ll drive you crazy if you don’t. Remember how it was for Han?” 

Chanyeol’s gut lurches, because he does remember. Han and Minseok, who had been dating each other for years, clearly in love and clearly meant to be soulmates, never ever, actually getting their names etched onto the other. Four years in, Han woke with someone else’s name on his wrist, but he refused, point blank, to break up with Minseok, and refused even more to look for the person named Yixing that was his real soulmate. 

It didn’t work. It ate away at him, made him sick, angry, almost led to him collapsing in the middle of the street had Minseok not been there with him. The soul bond, it knows. It tries to pull people together, burning it’s hottest when soulmates are near. Chanyeol and Kyungsoo have been together for long enough that theirs is just a simmering heat under their skin when they’re with each other, only occasionally growing hotter if they’ve been apart for too long. 

“You can’t ignore it, Chanyeol,” Kyungsoo says, speaking up again when Chanyeol still can’t find anything to say. He knows Kyungsoo is right, ultimately, but that doesn’t mean he has to like it. Kyungsoo takes his left hand in his, rubs his thumb over his name on Chanyeol’s wrist. “I’m not going anywhere, okay?” he says. “And...whoever this new person is...He’s gonna want to meet you, too. I know you well enough to know you won’t deny them, that. You don’t want to hurt him, do you?”

“No,” Chanyeol admits, shoulders slumping as he leans against Kyungsoo, pulling him close for comfort, reassurance. “I’m sorry,” he mumbles into his hair. “I didn’t know--I never wanted--”

“I know,” Kyungsoo says, patting his back, but he still sounds a little sad. Chanyeol can’t blame him; if it’d been the other way around, and Kyungsoo had woken up with Jongin’s name on his wrist, Chanyeol’s not sure he would’ve been very nice about it, either. “We’ll figure it out, okay?” 

“Okay,” Chanyeol says, instinctively reaching for where his name is written into Kyungsoo’s wrist. 

 

Chanyeol goes two weeks without getting any closer to learning the identity of his new soulmate, let alone meeting him. A google search only goes so far and he’s really hoping his soulmate isn’t the 42-year-old Jongin Kim who runs a disgusting vlog channel on YouTube. Kyungsoo keeps telling him not to stress about it, that as long as he doesn’t actively shy away from meeting his soulmate, then it’ll happen, but Chanyeol can tell he’s a little relieved. It’s just the two of them still. For now. 

The heat in his right wrist is tolerable, but on a Saturday afternoon on the first of August, it burns so hot Chanyeol feels like his blood is boiling from the inside out. 

He’s on a walk with Mongryong in Washington Square Park, taking care of him for the weekend for Baekhyun, who’s gone to visit his brother, when the heat hits him so suddenly he almost trips over his feet on the pavement. Mongryong barks at him loudly as Chanyeol leans over, bracing himself with hands on his knees, and catches his breath. It’s never been this strong before; his soulmate, this Jongin, must be around here, somewhere. 

Chanyeol swallows thickly, unsure what to do. He always hoped Kyungsoo would be around if this were to ever happen, but it’s just him, and Mongryong, and neither of them seem very much equipped to handle this. He takes a few deep breaths, then pulls himself back up, giving Mongryong and quick ruffle before starting up again. He’s going in the right way, but there are plenty of people around that it’s impossible, really, to tell who exactly is Chanyeol’s soulmate. 

In the end, maybe he was wrong about Mongryong. The second he sees a squirrel darting off into the grass, Mongryong turns to go after it, pulling the leash right out of Chanyeol’s lax grip. “Shit,” he exclaims, giving chase, because Baekhyun would kill him if he lost his beloved puppy, and by the time Chanyeol catches up to him, his wrist is aching and Mongryong doesn’t have a squirrel in his mouth, thankfully, but he is staring interestedly at another tiny puppy dozing next to its owner a few feet away under large tree. 

“Come on, buddy, let’s go,” Chanyeol says, tugging at Mongryong, who barks loudly as if in refusal and starts padding over. “No, you can’t--come _on_.” 

The barking gets a little louder, enough to wake the dark-furred poodle, who yips back at Mongryong. Chanyeol gives up on getting Mongryong to follow him, and instead hefts him up into his arms to carry, when the poodle’s owner awakens from the noise, too. Sleepy-eyed, with dark hair and a sharp jawline, the man looks up at Chanyeol and Chanyeol feels his breath catch in his throat. His heat in his wrist is painful. 

“Oh,” he says, hit with the sudden realization, the possibility, that this man, lying here with a yapping puppy and a book falling off his chest, is Jongin Kim. 

He doesn’t know if Jongin has Chanyeol’s name on his wrist, too, but from the startling way he clutches at his wrist, eyes widening at Chanyeol, it’s clear that he’s maybe understood the same thing. And Chanyeol should stay, should say hi and figure this out, but all he can think of is Kyungsoo, Chanyeol’s name on his wrist. 

Without saying anything, Chanyeol turns and leaves, letting down Mongryong at a safe distance away, and heads straight back to the apartment. The soul bond disapproves, a sickening churning in the pit of his stomach, but he doesn’t care. He can’t do this. Not yet. Not alone. 

“You’re such an idiot,” Kyungsoo says when Chanyeol clings to him later that day and whines that his wrist hurts. His whole body hurts, truthfully, a dull sort of ache as a result of running away, but it’s not as bad as the way Jongin’s name burns. “You should have talked to him.” 

“Not without you,” Chanyeol says, and Kyungsoo sighs, petting his hair, and doesn’t reply.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. this first chapter is kind of short but the next few are longer! it's hard to cut down a fic into chapters when i originally didn't plan to post it in chapters
> 
> 2\. this fic is 10000% meant to be a complete chankaisoo polyamory fic. no one ship is gonna reign supreme over the other. if you're hoping for just endgame chansoo/chankai/kaisoo you're in the wrong place.
> 
> 3\. i'm really interested to hear what you think!! i don't want to let this fic die so any comments will be greatly appreciated and hopefully i'll be able to pick up where i left off and finish this fic. :)
> 
> 4\. thank you so much for reading! ❤
> 
> come say hi on [twitter](http://twitter.com/xingkais) | [ask.fm](http://ask.fm/koiyake) | [tumblr](http://koiyake.tumblr.com)


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was really overwhelmed by the response to the first chapter ;~~; yall are very kind and i'm happy you're liking this so far! it's a little early but i figured i'd post the second part today. i hope you enjoy!

Having a face to put to the Jongin Kim that appears in his head is both good and bad. Chanyeol could ignore the thoughts so much easier before, pushing away the strange scenarios that’d pop up in his head about how he’d meet Jongin, what they’d say, the kind of person Jongin would turn out to be. Now, though, all he sees is that handsome face, the sleepy eyes, and he can’t get it out of his mind. 

There’s that face in his dreams, appearing behind his eyes when he closes them at any point throughout the day, swimming in and out of his thoughts as much as Kyungsoo does, another face that he feels suddenly attached to, without even knowing the man himself. 

This is what he deals with over the next week, this constant wonder and uncertainty. What would have happened if they’d stayed? Will he see Jongin again? Will he be brave enough to talk to him then?

Chanyeol has no answers to these questions. All he has is Jongin’s face plastered to his mind and an ache in his wrist that heats up every once in awhile, when he’s taking the subway home from work or meeting Jongdae for lunch at a Chipotle. He’ll feel it burn and he’ll look around, trying to see if he can find that familiar face, but Jongin either blends in too easily with the New York City crowd, or he’s not close enough. And Chanyeol hasn’t been brave enough to go find him. 

“What are you so afraid of?” Baekhyun says, when he drops by on a Friday night with beer and take out and Mongryong. Kyungsoo is working late at the office so it’s just the three of them, lounging out on the floor of the living room, legs stretched out under the coffee table and Mongryong lying between them as they watch old episodes of The Walking Dead on Chanyeol’s laptop. “I mean, obviously it’s a shock, but like, nothing says you _have_ to like this guy. The two of you could meet up and realize that you’re completely incompatible and your names will disappear, like how it was with Junmyeon and Jessica.” 

“Yeah but...what if...what if I like him?” Chanyeol whispers out, as if saying it any louder will make it come true. 

Baekhyun pauses with a piece of fried chicken halfway to his lips, giving Chanyeol a long, slightly unnerving look. “Then you learn to make it work,” he finally says, and Chanyeol slumps in defeat with a groan. “The way Han, Minseok and Yixing did. Honestly, you should talk to _them_.” 

“They’re on their honeymoon in Bora Bora or wherever the fuck they went,” Chanyeol grumbles, poking a french fry angrily into his pile of ketchup. “I don’t want to bother them.” 

“They’d probably love to help you, you know,” Baekhyun chides, nudging his foot under the table with his toes. 

“I know,” Chanyeol admits. “Maybe I’ll email Minseok later, when I’m less freaked out. After I meet this Jongin for real.” 

“Well,” Baekhyun says as he demolishes the piece of chicken in his hand and goes for another, speaking around his full mouth, “I hope for your sake, that happens soon.” 

 

Soon is not soon enough in Chanyeol’s opinion, because as the days drag on, the soul bond seems to grow angrier. It wasn’t like this, with Kyungsoo, whom Chanyeol had been with for over five years as friends before Kyungsoo’s name ever appeared on his skin. Kyungsoo was always there, and even if Chanyeol’s name took a few more months to appear on Kyungsoo’s right wrist, they never had to worry about the pain because they were nearly always together anyway. 

Chanyeol’s never heard of soul bonds being quite this agonizing though, or maybe he’s just gotten accustomed to the pleasant warmth that Kyungsoo’s bond brings that this new one feels like fire in comparison. It has him more tired than usual, a little short-tempered, and he hisses any time Kyungsoo touches his right wrist. 

“I’m sorry,” Chanyeol pleads afterwards, hovering his hands over Kyungsoo’s, wanting to grab them and squeeze gently, a sort of consolation in addition to his apology, but Kyungsoo shifts away, sighing. 

“It’s okay,” he says, even though he doesn’t look it. “I know it’s the bond. See? This is why you should’ve talked to him that day you met in the park.” He finally meets Chanyeol’s eyes. “It’s going to get worse. I don’t want to see you hurt.” 

Chanyeol licks his lips and says quietly, “This is hurting you, too.” 

“I’m fine,” Kyungsoo says, a little too quickly to be believable, but Chanyeol doesn’t want to push it right now. He knows how Kyungsoo needs to figure things out himself sometimes, before he can open up to Chanyeol. Still, he wilts a bit, still reaching out halfway for Kyungsoo’s hands, and Kyungsoo sighs again, before waving him over. “Come here,” he says, and Chanyeol’s goes, one of Kyungsoo’s hand cupping the back of his neck while Chanyeol’s finds the other and clutches tightly as they kiss. 

And this, in the midst of everything that’s uncertain and terrifying, is familiar, is comforting, is home. Chanyeol still doesn’t know why he has a second soulmate when he has Kyungsoo, but right now it doesn’t matter. Kyungsoo’s already told him he’s not going anywhere, that, really, Chanyeol’s new soulmate doesn’t change anything about what they have, and it’s this, maybe that Chanyeol needs to remember, more than anything. 

The fiery pain is at its calmest when Chanyeol is with Kyungsoo, so they do their best to spend more time together and Chanyeol doesn’t snatch his hand away if Kyungsoo tries to hold onto it. Chanyeol notices him staring at Jongin’s name every once in awhile, as if he’s trying to figure out who he is and where to find him by just the letters on Chanyeol’s skin, but he never says anything about it. Some weeknights when Kyungsoo stays behind at the office to meet deadlines are the worst, because Chanyeol might go nearly a full day without contact and Jongin’s name will burn the worst. 

It’s on one of these exceptionally rough days that Kyungsoo calls him a little past eight, when Chanyeol’s already at home, thinking about marathoning some of his favorite One Piece episodes, and asks him to come meet him for dinner if he hasn’t eaten yet. Chanyeol had gone out with Baekhyun after work, but he’d felt too sick to eat, distracted by the annoying burn and a few days without Kyungsoo’s closeness. 

“I’ll be right there,” he says eagerly, already halfway into his shoes as Kyungsoo tells him where he’ll be, before grabbing his keys and dashing out of the apartment. 

Kyungsoo’s sitting at a booth in a corner of the restaurant when Chanyeol arrives and Chanyeol’s heart picks up the way it’s done for years at just the sight of him. As he gets closer though, he realizes Kyungsoo’s talking with someone else, and his excitement dwindles just as the heat in his right wrist builds up dramatically, searing hot. 

Kyungsoo notices him first, eyes widening as he slips out of the booth and reaches a hand out for him. “Hey Chanyeol, this is--” he starts, but Chanyeol doesn’t need him to continue because he knows. 

This is the face that’s been haunting Chanyeol for over a week, the man he saw in the park with the the tiny puppy, whose name is hot against his skin at that very moment. His head feels light and woozy as he meets Jongin’s gaze, and that’s really the last thing he sees at all as the soul bond burns its worst and pulls him into darkness. 

 

When Chanyeol wakes, it’s to familiar hands in his hair and Kyungsoo’s concerned face staring down at him. He blinks rapidly through the brightness, realizing he’s lying with his head in Kyungsoo’s lap in the booth, and his head spins a little as he sits up. “Careful,” Kyungsoo says, watching him closely, “Have some water--”

A glass is shoved into his hands and as Chanyeol drinks, his vision clears, and his eyes settle on Jongin, who is sitting on other side of the booth, teeth pressed into his lower lip in clear worry. “Are you--are you okay?” he asks tentatively, and his voice is lower than Chanyeol expected. 

“Yeah,” he says, setting the glass back down. He glances at Kyungsoo, who is still watching him. “Yeah, I’m--what happened?”

“You passed out,” Kyungsoo says, and his hand, which had come to rest on Chanyeol’s thigh, squeezes the flesh tight. “Almost knocked your head on the table on the way down. Are you sure you’re all right? You were only out for a little bit, but we could go to the hospital if--”

“No, no, it’s okay. I’m fine,” Chanyeol says, and he does feel better. The burning is mostly gone, a much calmer heat against his wrist now. “It was the bond, I think. I don’t know. But I’m okay. So, uh, you can both stop looking like I died.” 

Kyungsoo doesn’t seem convinced but he at least stops digging his nails into Chanyeol’s leg. Jongin lets out a huff of air, a little laugh, and his expression relaxes as he gives Chanyeol a small smile. He looks much younger like this, his hair falling into his face. “We probably should have warned you that I was going to be here but Kyungsoo said--”

“I said you might not show,” Kyungsoo finishes. “Jongin...Jongin is a new hire at the magazine.”

“I started there today,” Jongin adds. He won’t stop looking at Chanyeol and it’s both somehow pleasing and uncomfortable. Chanyeol can’t really stop looking at him, either, so he’s not in any position to tell Jongin to cut it out. It’s like his eyes are magnetized to every move Jongin makes, the way his full lips part, how he scratches at his neck a little as he speaks, the bob of his adam’s apple. “Kyungsoo--he practically dropped a whole stack of papers when I introduced myself.”

“Yeah, well, you spilled your sugary coffee all over your table when I told you I was Chanyeol’s soulmate,” Kyungsoo says, and Chanyeol’s surprised to hear a little amusement in his voice. It’s not that he expected Kyungsoo to be outright hostile to Jongin when they ever met, but he didn’t expect this...friendliness either. 

“You were so blunt about it,” Jongin says. He’s nervous, Chanyeol can tell, the way his hands keep fidgeting like he doesn’t know what to do with them, tugging at the long sleeves of his loose cardigan or brushing his bangs out of his face. He’s...kind of cute, Chanyeol thinks, his chest squeezing tightly, and he’s definitely an attractive boy now that Chanyeol can see him properly. His right wrist is simmering with pleasure. 

“I’m sorry I ran from you the other day,” Chanyeol blurts out, rubbing at his wrist, and Jongin blinks at him for a second before he laughs, his face breaking out into a bright, beautiful smile that lights up his eyes. Chanyeol stares back, shocked, heart loud in his ears, as Jongin tries unsuccessfully to hide his amusement behind a hand. 

“It’s okay,” he says finally, his gaze soft. “I might have done the same thing.” His smile widens. It’s really pretty. Chanyeol’s always been a sucker for boys with nice smiles. “And, honestly, it’s probably better that we’re meeting here like this. With both of you.” 

“How come?” Kyungsoo asks, before Chanyeol can open his mouth. He’s gripping Chanyeol’s leg tightly again, and watching Jongin much like the way a hawk would watch its prey. 

Jongin only looks a little discomfited by it as he says, “Um, there’s something you both should see.” 

And before either of them can ask, Jongin is pushing up the sleeves on both his arms and holding out his wrists across the table. There, on Jongin’s left, is Chanyeol’s name, clear as day. But on the right, there’s Kyungsoo’s, in the same black writing as it is on Chanyeol’s skin. 

“Well, that,” Chanyeol says weakly, as Kyungsoo continues to stare, dumbfounded, “is unexpected.” 

 

Jongin, Chanyeol learns that night, is a 25 year old, fresh out of graduate school, who had just moved into the city for his new job from Boston. He’s had Chanyeol’s and Kyungsoo’s names on his wrists for three years. “They appeared together,” he says, looking down at his hands curiously, like he’s not even sure that they’re real. 

“It’s probably because three years ago is when we got ours,” Kyungsoo says. He still keeps glancing at Jongin’s wrists, too. “And that’s probably why Chanyeol only got your name now; once you moved close enough for the two of you to meet.” 

“I wondered about that, too,” Jongin admits. “If maybe one or both of you were here, because I could feel it. It was stronger than ever before.” 

“At least you didn’t pass out like me,” Chanyeol mutters, but then adds quickly, “I mean, you didn’t, did you? You haven’t been sick or anything?”

Jongin’s eyes widen at the sudden concern, the fierceness in Chanyeol’s voice. It’s like he wasn’t expecting Chanyeol to care so much already. There’s a small little smile on his face as he shakes his head. “No, I’ve been mostly all right. Maybe a little more tired than usual,” he says. “Though it did get worse, that day when we almost met. I could barely get out of bed.”

Chanyeol winces at that, feeling guilty, but Jongin smiles at him again as if to say it’s okay, and adds, “I wasn’t expecting to come here and actually meet my soulmates.” He says soul _mates_ so easily, so naturally, but then he’s had years to accept that there are two people waiting for him somewhere. Chanyeol has only had a few weeks. “I don’t know how this is going to work, or...well, if either of you even want it to work, but I’m glad I found you.” 

He’s not looking at either of them now, staring down at his lap instead, and his cheeks are dusted with a faint pink. Chanyeol’s chest tightens; he really is cute. “I’m glad I found you, too,” he says without thinking. Kyungsoo tenses beside him at that, and Chanyeol glances over at him with soft eyes, hoping he’s not misunderstanding anything. He takes Kyungsoo’s hand and holds it tight. “I was scared when your name showed up. I didn’t want to meet you at all.” There’s a flash of disappointment in Jongin’s eyes then, and guilt claws at him again, but he presses on, “But I know I’d keep wondering about you if we didn’t, and well, I’m glad I won’t have to do that anymore.” 

Jongin holds his gaze, eyes warm and hopeful, and Chanyeol’s not sure what’s going to come from this, but he is grateful that they’re here. He smiles at him, a real one, and his wrist simmers happily. 

 

“Do you like him?” Kyungsoo asks later. They’re getting ready for bed. Kyungsoo’s just stepped out of the shower, his hair ruffled and damp, and he’s pulling one of Chanyeol’s shirts over his head. 

Chanyeol hesitates. He doesn’t want Kyungsoo to be upset, but he doesn’t want to lie. “He’s...cute,” he admits, because he thought it more than once while meeting Jongin and it seems the most appropriate description for now. 

“He is,” Kyungsoo agrees after a moment, and Chanyeol breathes a little easier at that. “But do you like him?”

It takes a moment, but then Chanyeol realizes exactly what Kyungsoo’s asking. He grips the shirt in his hand that he’d pulled out to wear, and turns to look at Kyungsoo who is staring back at him, face unreadable. Chanyeol is usually really good at reading Kyungsoo, understanding when he’s closed off, knowing when best and how far he can push his buttons. Right now, he wishes soulmates could read minds or something, because Kyungsoo gives nothing away in his expression, just exudes this curiosity. Sadness. 

“I don’t even know him,” Chanyeol finally answers and he tugs his shirt on, too. He doesn’t like the way Kyungsoo is watching him, doesn’t like what he’s implying with his question. He brushes past him, plugging up his phone to charge on the bedside table and climbs into bed. 

“But you want to, right?” Kyungsoo asks and Chanyeol’s getting tired of this interrogation. “You exchanged numbers.” 

“Hey, you’re the one who told me I couldn’t just ignore this,” Chanyeol says, snapping at Kyungsoo in a way he rarely ever does. Kyungsoo doesn’t even flinch and Chanyeol already wants to take back his harsh words. He groans, runs a hand through his hair before holding it out for Kyungsoo. “Will you come here?” 

Kyungsoo turns off the main room light and Chanyeol hastily tugs on the lamp on the side table as Kyungsoo crawls into bed beside him. He looks small and soft at night, drowning in Chanyeol’s shirt and his hair hanging loose over his head. It’s usually styled up during the day, but Chanyeol likes it like this, reaching out to brush back the bangs. “This is weird,” Kyungsoo finally says and Chanyeol drops his hand instantly like it’s been burned. “No--I’m--That’s not what I meant,” he says, taking Chanyeol’s hand. “I don’t want you to ignore it, but that doesn’t mean it’s not weird. Jongin is...Jongin seems really nice, and the two of you got on pretty well, considering how adamant you’d been about not wanting to meet him.” 

“Like I said,” Chanyeol mumbles, “he was cute. He does seem nice. That made it easier.” 

“I know,” Kyungsoo says, smiling a little. “I could tell.” He slides his hand up Chanyeol’s arm, palms the back of his neck. Chanyeol leans into it easily like a puppy, happy for the attention and the comforting touch. It’s been a long night, but this feel right. “I’m sorry, I just--I’m still trying to figure out how I feel about this.” 

Chanyeol gets it, he does. He’s still trying to figure it out, too. He wishes Kyungsoo would open up to him about it a little more, because this is way more than just Chanyeol and Jongin having each other’s names on their wrists. Jongin has Kyungsoo’s too, and Kyungsoo hasn’t said a word about that. Chanyeol’s hesitant to bring it up. “Okay,” he says in the end, because he knows he just has to give Kyungsoo a little time. “I love you, you know that, right?” 

“I do,” Kyungsoo agrees, and he’s smiling fully now, leaning in to give Chanyeol a kiss. “You’re my soulmate.” 

Chanyeol beams, his left wrist burning hot in happiness. His right has been mostly quiet ever since he and Jongin parted. As Kyungsoo turns out the light and lets Chanyeol curl up next to him, the heat of Kyungsoo’s bond lulling him to sleep, Chanyeol can almost pretend that Jongin’s doesn’t exist at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. they finally meet! progress!! 
> 
> 2\. will kyungsoo ever get jongin's name on his wrist? stay tuned! 
> 
> 3\. again i'm really interested to hear what you think! questions? comments? please let me know! 
> 
> 4\. thank you so much for reading! ❤
> 
> come say hi on [twitter](http://twitter.com/xingkais) | [ask.fm](http://ask.fm/koiyake) | [tumblr](http://koiyake.tumblr.com)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter chanyeol gets some advice and spends more time with jongin. :D

Chanyeol tries to meet his sister at least once month. Yura’s been busier than usual lately with a case she’s working on, being a high-powered attorney and all that, so Chanyeol makes the trip to her office on an evening with Chinese takeout and his worries. 

“You didn’t end up with your soulmate,” Chanyeol says halfway through dinner. He hasn’t really eaten much of anything, poking around at his food instead. His mind keeps wandering back to Kyungsoo’s conversation from a few nights before and wondering if he should contact Jongin or not. “Wasn’t that hard for you?”

Yura taps her chopsticks to her lips and looks thoughtful. She’s got her heels kicked off and feet stretched out atop her desk, a stack of papers on the other side. Chanyeol forced her to close her laptop and focus on eating instead of working. “Maybe a little,” she says. “We always grow up thinking our soulmates are _the one_ , you know? But it doesn’t always have to be like that.” She smiles at Chanyeol as she digs around in her carton for more food. “My soulmate didn’t turn out to be someone I wanted to spend my life with the way you and Kyungsoo are. But that doesn’t mean I love her any less. We’re best friends.” She suddenly sits up straight, pulling her legs down and beaming at Chanyeol. “Did I tell you? She’s getting married.” 

“Really?” Chanyeol says, eyes wide. 

“Yup,” Yura says happily. “She asked me to be a bridesmaid. I’m really happy for her. I felt it, when she told me.” She holds up her wrist, grinning. “It worked out for us because neither of us were interested in something more than friendship. And I’ve found someone else, who I think is my other soulmate, even if his name isn’t on my wrist.” 

Chanyeol’s mind spins a little as he processes this information. He looks down at his food, pops a piece of meat into his mouth and chews silently. He can feel Yura’s eyes on him but doesn’t look up. 

“Chanyeol,” she says softly after a long stretch of silence. “What you and Kyungsoo have is really special. I know how much you love him. But I don’t think you should be afraid of this Jongin kid either.” 

“I’m not--”

“You are,” Yura interrupts, and he can hear her setting down her food, the squeak of her chair as she undoubtedly gets up. She sits down next to him on the nice leather couch and pats his knee. “It’s okay to be afraid. But you won’t know what will happen unless you try, and maybe you and Jongin won’t fall in love. Maybe you’ll end up making a really great friend instead.” 

“What if I do, though?” Chanyeol asks, the same thing he’d asked Baekhyun and he hopes that his sister will have a better answer for him. 

She doesn’t. “You’ll figure it out,” is all she says. “Together, with Kyungsoo and with Jongin. You’ll make it work out.” 

He’s tired of hearing this. He squeezes his box of food in his hand and says, “What if I don’t want it to work out? Then what?”

“Then you should be thinking about who you’re really hurting,” Yura says firmly, not even batting an eye at Chanyeol’s cold tone. “And, if I think I know you baby bro, then I know you better to think you’d want to hurt anyone, including yourself.” She pats his knee again as Chanyeol slumps, feeling drained. He’d come here to talk about this but now he wishes he’d just kept it to himself. “Besides, you know the soul bonds work in weird ways. If Jongin really isn’t meant to be your soulmate, then it might disappear.” 

“I guess,” Chanyeol says, heaving a sigh. “I probably shouldn’t wish for that, though, right?

“Right,” Yura agrees. “Because that’s not really being fair to Jongin, is it? I know this is hard for you, but just think about how he might be feeling, too. He’s had longer to accept two soulmates, but he’s finally found you and you’re saying you don’t want him, just like that?” 

Chanyeol winces. His sister is right. He’d been lucky, with Kyungsoo. They’d been friends long before their marks appeared and it made everything much easier, the transition from friendship into lovers. Chanyeol would’ve felt awful, if he’d gone to meet his soulmate, and his soulmate wanted nothing to do with him. 

He groans, turning to Yura properly to pout at her. “Why do you have to make me feel bad?” he whines and she laughs loudly at him. 

“It’s my job as your sister,” she says brightly. “Now eat up, bro, or I’m stealing all your food, too.” 

 

Jongin texts Chanyeol to meet him at the park the next day and Chanyeol flounders for a couple of minutes until Kyungsoo threatens to take his phone and answer for him. 

“You should come, too,” Chanyeol says quickly, putting on his best puppy face, but Kyungsoo just shakes his head. 

“He asked you,” Kyungsoo says. “The two of you already have each other’s names and I think it’ll be best to take this a step at a time.” When Chanyeol still looks uncertain, Kyungsoo reaches up to give his hair a rough ruffle. “Go,” he says firmly. “It’ll be fine.” 

Chanyeol goes. He finds Jongin where he said he’d be, sitting under the shade of that same tree with his puppy like the first time they’d seen each other, and he looks up with a smile when Chanyeol walks over. His eyes are hopeful. 

“You didn’t bring your puppy?” Jongin asks, and his lips push out in a little pout. 

“Oh,” Chanyeol says, remembering. “That was my friend’s dog, Mongryong. I was just watching him for the weekend.” 

Jongin nods in understanding, and pulls his own puppy over to introduce to Chanyeol. “This is Monggu,” he says brightly, even lifting one of Monggu’s paws up in a wave. “Say hi to Chanyeol, Monggu.” 

The puppy barks at Chanyeol but Chanyeol is grinning at Jongin, endeared already. That’s a little terrifying, considering they’ve been out here for five minutes, but Chanyeol likes cute puppies and even cuter boys and he feels comfortable. Still grinning, he reaches out a hand toward Monggu, letting the pup sniff him carefully before it decides Chanyeol is good people and licks at his fingertips. Chanyeol rewards him with a pet atop his head and when he glances back at Jongin, he’s watching them both with a bright smile. 

Chanyeol’s wrist pulses hotly and he rubs it discreetly over his knee as he settles back more comfortably on the ground. “I’m glad you called me,” he finds himself saying. 

“Are you?” Jongin says, looking surprised. He seems to realize that might’ve sounded offensive and tacks on hastily, “It’s just that--You already have a soulmate and it didn’t seem like you were interested."

Chanyeol flinches a little because he never wanted Jongin to notice that. "I'm sorry," he says, meeting Jongin's eyes and hoping he can see the sincerity. "I didn't want you to know that."

"Because it's true, right?" Jongin says with a sad smile. His fingers play with the grass around his knees and he watches Monggu drag a stick over before he speaks again. "And I get it, you know? Why wouldn't you be upset when you've been in a relationship for three years already?"

Chanyeol doesn't know what to say, just sits there and watches as Jongin pets Monggu a few times before tossing the stick to the side a few feet for him to catch. 

Jongin looks back at him, brushing back strands of hair from his face. "I've only been there a few days but already I've heard about how everyone thinks you and Kyungsoo are the cutest couple. That you stop by and bring him dinner on nights he works late, that Kyungsoo dropped everything when he heard you were in an accident two years ago, even though you only had a concussion and a sprained ankle." He's smiling for real now, but Chanyeol can still see the sadness and his wrist throbs in pain at the same beat as his heart.

"We're soulmates," Chanyeol says, a little proudly, defiantly. 

"I know," Jongin says with a sigh. "And I know this is probably weird for you, that you never wanted this...that you don't want me." He takes another shaky breath and Chanyeol wonders if he might be trying not to cry and just that thought has his chest burning. He wants to reach out and comfort him, his bond is almost begging him to do it, but Chanyeol doesn't know if that's something Jongin would want. 

Finally, Jongin looks back at him, and indeed his eyes are a little shiny, but he says, clearly and simply, "Despite all that, I...I want to get to know you. Both of you." He licks his lips and Chanyeol tries not to stare. "Couldn't you at least give me a chance?"

There’s that hope in his eyes again, but there's also this vulnerability that Chanyeol hasn't seen before. Jongin just told him how he felt, that he understands why Chanyeol doesn't want this, and yet he's still putting himself out there, wanting to see where this can go. And everyone's been telling Chanyeol the same thing, that he shouldn't give up before taking the leap, and isn't that all Jongin’s asking for? 

He swallows thickly and nods. Firm, no room for doubt. "Yes," he says, his voice just as confident, and as he says it, he feels it, too. "I can do that." 

 

Chanyeol’s always been good at making new friends, and with Jongin he doesn’t feel like that is much different. Sure, he’s a little more careful, apprehensive, is constantly reminded of their soulmate status when his wrist sings in pleasure at Jongin’s pretty smile or when he meets his eyes for a long second and then looks away shyly. Chanyeol does his best to ignore that part of it though, because he wants to know Jongin on his own, and not because of the bond telling him how to feel. 

The rest of that first afternoon goes by better than the start; there’s no more tears at least and Jongin seems to grow more comfortable as Chanyeol, too, loosens up. Jongin tells him about how it’s been moving into the city, how finding an apartment has been an overwhelming hassle but he’s finally signed the lease and started moving in. “My friend, Sehun, whom I’ve been crashing with? He’s been so happy about it that he even offered to help me move and he’s the laziest person I know,” Jongin had said with a laugh. “But it might’ve been because Monggu chewed up one of his designer snapbacks and he wants us both out as soon as possible.” 

Chanyeol, in turn, tells Jongin bits and pieces about himself. How he works as a website designer and spends the rest of his time on his guitar or keyboard and sometimes drives Kyungsoo nuts playing at one in the morning when he’s sleeping. Jongin seems interested in his stories about Kyungsoo, while still looking a little wistful about it, too, like he’s displeased that Kyungsoo isn’t there with them, too. So Chanyeol tries to keep his mentions of Kyungsoo to a minimum, which isn’t as difficult as he expected, especially once he and Jongin discover a shared love for One Piece.

Over the next week, Jongin winds his way into Chanyeol’s life in a way he never expected. He’s not overbearing or anything, but sends Chanyeol texts once or twice in a day, pictures of Monggu sleeping or what he happened to eat during lunch. He asks Chanyeol more about himself, questions the best places in the city for food, and eventually asks Chanyeol if he wouldn’t mind going down to Koreatown with him because Sehun claims he’s too busy. 

Chanyeol meets him at one of the subway stops on a Friday evening after work and feels a little ridiculous because Jongin is dressed so nicely in his fitted jeans and tucked-in button-up. His sleeves are rolled up to his elbows and his hair is coiffed up from his face for the first time since Chanyeol’s met him and it shows off the lines of his jaw. Chanyeol’s work doesn’t usually call for anything more than showing up in something not pajamas, so he’s only got on an oversized hoodie and ratty jeans, but Jongin is beaming regardless when he joins him. 

They end up stopping at a couple of shops in K-town and Jongin fills a little basket full of food at the grocery. “I’m not really good at cooking,” he tells Chanyeol sheepishly, “but I think I make a pretty decent samgyetang.” He flushes a little and mumbles, “It’s edible, anyway.” 

Chanyeol laughs, amused, because Jongin is really cute and is filling his basket with one too many boxes of pepero. “I love to cook,” Chanyeol says, grinning as they head for the checkout. Chanyeol’s got a couple of things in his hands, too, that he knows they’re out of at home. “Kyungsoo sometimes doesn’t have the time for it, but I like it. It’s relaxing, you know?” Jongin nods at him, watching him with almost rapt attention, and it’s kind of flattering, honestly. “You should come over sometime and I’ll cook for you. It’ll blow you away.” 

It takes him a second to realize just what he’s offered, and the words only click in his head when Jongin’s expression shifts, his mouth opening in surprise. Chanyeol feels a little stupid for not thinking before he speaks, but then again, he doesn’t exactly find the need to take his words back. So when Jongin asks gently, “Do you mean that?” Chanyeol smiles at him genuinely and answers, “Yes.” 

Jongin continues to stare at him for a moment, long enough that Chanyeol feels heat creep up the back of his neck, but then he smiles, too, so soft and beautiful that it has his name on Chanyeol’s wrist humming happily. “Okay,” he says, and his voice rings in happiness, too. “I’d like that.” 

As Chanyeol shuffles after him, meeting his eyes again and unable to help the smile that seems permanently etched onto his face, he thinks that he’d really quite like it, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. i'm sorry these chapters are so short T_T i'm trying not to post the whole thing too soon before i have a chance to pick up where i left off. also i have certain scenes that i want to use as cliffhangers lol this is the problem with making chapters after the fact sigh
> 
> 2\. jongin is a qt he deserves all the love;; at least things are progressing somewhat...right?
> 
> 3\. what about kyungsoo u ask? don't worry he'll be back in the next chapter!
> 
> 4\. thank you again for all the kind comments you've been leaving. i'm really happy you've been enjoying this fic! T_T
> 
> come say hi on [twitter](http://twitter.com/xingkais) | [ask.fm](http://ask.fm/koiyake) | [tumblr](http://koiyake.tumblr.com)


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in this chapter chanyeol and kyungsoo have an argument, and chanyeol and jongin's bond grows just a little stronger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahhhh i'm sorry this is so late but it's been a rough week after the election. i hope ur all doing well ❤ enjoy this update~
> 
> (this chapter is nc17)

Chanyeol goes to an open mic sometimes at a cafe on Mondays. He plays a cover or two on the guitar, sings softly into the mic and enjoys the attention and the atmosphere, the applause. Tonight, there’s Kyungsoo sitting in the front, clapping along with everyone else, a proud little smile on his face, and Chanyeol’s heart is warm and content in his chest. 

“You didn’t sing Creep again for the fiftieth time, I’m impressed,” Kyungsoo says when Chanyeol joins him at the table, setting his guitar case down carefully by his feet. 

“Hey, there’s nothing wrong with that song,” Chanyeol pouts and Kyungsoo pats his knee and says, indulgently, “Sure there isn’t.” 

Chanyeol doesn’t care about the ribbing, he’s just glad to see Kyungsoo, have him here. He’s been so busy lately, and Chanyeol’s spent a lot of his own time with Jongin in the past week or so that it feels like ages since the two of them have been out together like this. Rushed kisses in the morning and stealing lunch here and there isn’t quite the same. Chanyeol’s wrist burns as warm as his heart. 

Kyungsoo orders Chanyeol a drink and Chanyeol scoots his chair a little closer so he can whisper in Kyungsoo’s ear without having to move too much. Kyungsoo’s hand is still on his knee and Chanyeol revels in it as they watch the other performers, discussing song choices and clapping extra hard for the young girl who does a great cover of Uptown Funk. 

“Sing something,” Chanyeol nudges Kyungsoo when there’s a call for any last-minute additions to the roster. Kyungsoo just shakes his head but Chanyeol can be persuasive (or annoying, depending on who’s asked) when he wants to be, and he pokes and prods at Kyungsoo until he finally gives in. 

He goes up after some drunk man who sings Call Me Maybe off-key, adjusting the height of the mic which has Chanyeol snickering as he watches. Kyungsoo sits on the small stool, giving the crowd a smile, and then finds Chanyeol’s eyes and holds his gaze for the entirety of his slow, acapella cover of Rihanna’s Skin. 

This is definitely payback. 

Kyungsoo’s smirking when he gets off the stage, Chanyeol waiting for him off to the side, body thrumming with want. “That was mean,” he says, and Kyungsoo’s touch is both relief and excitement, fingers tight where they grip the back of his neck and draw him down so he can speak right into his ear. 

“Let’s go home,” he says, and Chanyeol might be vibrating visibly with want, what with the way Kyungsoo laughs a little at him. 

It’s been awhile but they fall into it as easily as if there’s been no wait between the last time. Kyungsoo kisses Chanyeol until he’s breathless and aching for it, hands scrambling to pull off shirts, undo buttons and zippers on their jeans, and Kyungsoo laughs again, the sound ringing pleasantly in their room, as Chanyeol almost trips out of his pants in his haste. 

“So eager,” he says, pulling Chanyeol back to him, and Chanyeol just narrows his eyes, presses his palm to Kyungsoo’s growing erection through his boxer briefs. 

“And whose fault is that?” Chanyeol demands, but Kyungsoo just gives him a blinking innocent look as he drags him into another kiss. 

Kyungsoo fucks him slowly that night, like he’s taking his time, and Chanyeol is so worked up from the bar, from Kyungsoo’s touch, his attention, that it’s more difficult than usual to make it last, hold out for when Kyungsoo tells him it’s okay to come. He can only clench his fists into the sheets, stare over his shoulder as Kyungsoo thrusts into him from behind, filling him up so completely, and shudders full-bodily when he leans forward to tell him how good he is, pressing kisses up his spine. 

“Mine,” he whispers into Chanyeol’s ear as he comes, and one of his hands find Chanyeol’s right wrist, digs his fingernails into Jongin’s name etched there, like he’s trying to claw it off, and Chanyeol gasps as he follows, too, Kyungsoo’s cock pulsing inside. 

There’s an ache in Chanyeol’s chest as they clean up afterward, a sinking understanding as he stares at Kyungsoo and smiles back weakly at his little curved smirks. Chanyeol follows him out to the kitchen, leaning against the counter as Kyungsoo pours himself some water, gnawing on his lower lip until he finally just says, “We need to talk about this.” 

Kyungsoo arches a brow at him, waits until he’s downed half his glass then says, “About what?”

“You can’t just keep acting like it’s not happening.” When Kyungsoo opens his mouth as if to refute him, Chanyeol adds, “You know what I’m talking about, don’t even pretend.” 

Kyungsoo narrows his eyes into a glare, standing on the other side of their kitchen and still holding onto his glass of water where it’s sitting on the countertop. He looks like he’s having a battle inside his head, and Chanyeol waits for him to sort it out, watching him carefully, until his expression shifts and he drops his hand. “You’ve been spending a lot of time with him,” he says finally, meeting Chanyeol’s gaze. “I asked you this before but...it’s different now. Do you like him?”

“I do,” Chanyeol says without hesitation because it’s true. He knows Jongin better now. Knows he’s a shy, cute boy who really loves puppies and chicken and spends most of his time reading and reading and reading. He’s recommended Chanyeol about twenty books in the short amount of time they’ve known each other, and it’s so easy to tell when he’s interested in something, his passion shining through in every excited word that tumbles out of his mouth. He’s almost impossible to stop. Chanyeol thinks that’s when he’s the cutest, eyes shining bright and smile so wide, and Chanyeol’s wrist simmers warmly when he watches him.

And Jongin is cute in a different way than Kyungsoo, whom Chanyeol’s always thought was adorable, too. Kyungsoo is the kind of person who resents being called cute but is accidentally cute sometimes, with the slow way he takes his time to speak or when he squints so hard to read something without his glasses it looks like he’s angry. Jongin is just cute, nearly all the time, from his pointless text messages to his pretty smile, to the way he taps his fingers on tabletops or his knees, swaying a bit to an imaginary beat. 

“You like him _a lot_ , don’t you?” Kyungsoo says, breaking through Chanyeol’s thoughts, and he’s not sure what kind of expression was on his face, but Kyungsoo looks somewhere between hurt and incredulous, stepping back from Chanyeol like he needs to protect himself, even as that has Chanyeol’s heart aching, he can’t find it in him to refute it. 

“You’d like him too, if you gave him a chance,” he says instead and Kyungsoo is shaking his head, quickly shuffling out of the kitchen away from Chanyeol, the conversation. 

“I’m going to bed,” he says as he passes and Chanyeol quickly grabs his elbow to stop him. 

“I’m not done talking about this!”

“What do you need to talk to me for anyway?” Kyungsoo says as he tugs his arm away, and it comes out harsh, cold in the room, all the warmth from earlier, from Kyungsoo’s touches, his kisses, feel like a distant memory. “You have Jongin now, don’t you?”

Chanyeol stands there, stunned, and only barely makes out the sound of Kyungsoo slamming the door to their bedroom behind him. He stands there, staring down the hall, and for the first time in a long time, it’s Kyungsoo’s name on his wrist that burns angrily. 

 

 

Chanyeol’s never been one to get upset and with Kyungsoo, he’s never had a reason to be. In the morning, Kyungsoo is gone, seemingly like he’d left early for work to maybe avoid Chanyeol, but still Chanyeol sends him a message telling him he loves him, that he’s sorry, and he hopes Kyungsoo has a good day. 

He doesn’t get anything in return until he’s at the office, and even then it’s just a heart emoticon, but from Kyungsoo, that means a lot. Chanyeol knows he’s still thinking about it and Chanyeol wants to push him more, get him to talk about it because only then can they attempt to fix it, but he knows pushing Kyungsoo when he’s upset is like poking a fire-breathing dragon, and Chanyeol’s wrist already feels burnt enough. 

He knows Kyungsoo will come to him. 

He isn’t, however, expecting it to take so long. Chanyeol goes home that first night to an empty apartment, which isn’t so unusual. Kyungsoo texts him an hour later to say he’ll be working overtime and Chanyeol ends up going to bed without him and wakes up the next morning to an empty bed, with only the dirty dishes in the sink to tell him Kyungsoo had come home at all. The next two days go on in the same vein, Chanyeol checking in on Kyungsoo, trying to let him know in his own way that he’s not angry, that he’s worried, and Kyungsoo’s answers are as short as always, but tell Chanyeol in turn that he’s really not upset with him. 

Knowing that helps, but still Chanyeol feels rather miserable since Kyungsoo seems to be doing his best to avoid any actual confrontation. Chanyeol doesn’t ever remember a time they’ve gone this long without seeing each other since they got together. The last time was probably when they were still in school, going home over breaks, but that never hurt as much as it does now, when the bond between them burns agitatedly nearly all day long. 

“Well, what do you want me to do when he won’t even look at me?” Chanyeol grumbles to his wrist on Thursday morning, when he woke up just in time to hear Kyungsoo leave the apartment for work. His wrist just throbs back unhelpfully and Chanyeol lies awake in bed for as long as he can until he, too, has to get ready for the day. 

Knowing he’s meeting Jongin in the evening to see a movie is the only thing that really gets him through the day. He’d mentioned it to Kyungsoo last week, invited him to come along but Kyungsoo had easily declined and Chanyeol...Chanyeol really should have talked to him sooner about this, figured it all out before Chanyeol started meeting Jongin, but what else could he have done, really, when Kyungsoo said it was okay, that he’d still love him and be with him, regardless? 

Chanyeol should maybe be more upset with Kyungsoo but he doesn’t have the energy and the bond is already being so unbearable. But in the midst of it all, there’s the excitement of seeing Jongin and spending time with him that helps, picks him up from off the ground. 

Except later that night, Jongin doesn’t show. Chanyeol’s been waiting for twenty minutes, pressed up against the side of the building to make way for the usual sidewalk traffic, and he’s feeling much more disappointed than he ever thought he’d be. It hits him as he pulls out his phone and calls Jongin, listening to the slow rings and realizing that Jongin’s woven his way into his life so much recently that the prospect of _not_ seeing him when they made plans has his heart sinking into the pit of his stomach. 

As Chanyeol calls Jongin for the second time and receives voicemail yet again, his heart drops to his knees in worry. Jongin isn’t the best at answering to texts for phone calls, something that Chanyeol had quickly learned, so it’s not impossible that his phone is on silent or he accidentally left it at home, but Chanyeol can’t shake the feeling that maybe something is wrong. His right wrist itches and he waits ten more minutes, peering anxiously above people’s heads for a familiar face, until he gives in. 

Jongin had sent him his address the past week when he’d asked him to meet him there before dinner, so Chanyeol pulls it up on his phone and checks the fastest way to get there. The bond is burning by the time he gets to Jongin’s place, rushing up the cramped stairwell to the third floor and knocking roughly a few times before he steps back and catches his breath. 

There’s a lot of silence, and then the door creaks open and Jongin is there, wearing just a pair of underwear, barely visible under a large pokemon t-shirt. Chanyeol has to yank his eyes away from Jongin’s thighs to his tired face, eyes dark and sleepy, and his hair a tousled mess. Then, suddenly, there is dawning in Jongin’s eyes and he gasps, “Oh no, I was supposed to meet you, wasn’t I? That was today, shit, I’m so sorry I completely lost track of time I’m--”

“Hey, hey,” Chanyeol says, holding his hands up and smiling. “It’s okay, don’t worry about that.” He gives Jongin a slow once-over again, rubs the inside of his wrist. “Are you alright? You look--well, you look kind of awful.” 

Jongin lets out a hollow laugh, pushes a hand through his hair which really does nothing but make it stick out more, and then stands aside to let Chanyeol into the apartment. “I’ve got a cold or something,” Jongin says. “I think this fever’s lasted three days.” 

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Chanyeol asks, and it comes out a little more forcefully than he meant. Jongin’s eyes widen in surprise, and Chanyeol hastily tacks on, “I thought something had happened when you didn’t show.” 

“I’m sorry,” Jongin murmurs again, shifting a little guiltily, and Chanyeol shakes his head. 

“Don’t worry about it,” he says, “I’m glad you’re fine. Or, well, as fine as you can be with a fever.” 

Jongin cracks a smile at that. It disappears in the next second as he shivers, hands rubbing up and down his arms, and Chanyeol instantly propels into action, grabbing Jongin’s elbow and tugging him into his bedroom. “Get in,” he says, and Jongin is watching him with an expression somewhere between confused and amused, but does as he’s told. “Have you taken any medicine?” Jongin nods sleepily as he rests his head on the pillow. Beside him, Monggu is sleeping, too, curled up in a fluffy ball against Jongin’s blue sheets. “Okay, then just rest.” 

“I’m really sorry,” Jongin mumbles. “Didn’t you say you really wanted to go see this movie--You could still make it, you don’t have to stay--”

Chanyeol shakes his head with a smile. “It’s fine,” he says, and he means it. “The plan was to spend time together and watching a movie is no fun on your own.” It’s something that’s always been a little difficult with Kyungsoo, who almost prefers going to the theater by himself. “If you’d rather I leave, though…” 

Jongin’s hand practically shoots out from under the covers and curls his fingers into the hem of his shirt. “Don’t,” he says, eyes wide. “I-I’d like it if you’d stay.” 

Chanyeol stares down at his hand and Jongin seems to realize what he’s just done and yanks it back just as quickly, and there’s this sudden urge bursting in Chanyeol’s chest that’s screaming at him to reach for him, link their hands together and reassure him it’s okay, and it surprises him, because he’s never felt something quite like this with Jongin before. He doesn’t dislike it, either. 

In the end he just smiles again, gently tugs Jongin’s sheets up to his chin. “Sure,” he says. “When did you last eat?” 

“Awhile ago,” Jongin says vaguely, and Chanyeol nods, straightening up on his feet. 

“Sleep,” Chanyeol says. “I’ll be here.” 

Jongin nods, eyes already drooping, and Chanyeol stares at him for a moment before he slips out of the room. 

By the time Jongin wakes three hours later, Chanyeol’s made dinner for the two of them, the small apartment infused with the scent of gochujang. “You made jjigae?” Jongin says, stumbling out of the bedroom looking slightly more alive than earlier but still as disheveled, his hair messy in his eyes and his shirt askew, showing off his shoulders. Chanyeol wishes he’d put on pants but bites his tongue and just nods. 

“I told you I’d cook for you sometime, didn’t I? I just had to make due with what you had, so it’s not really my speciality but--”

“Are you nervous about me trying your cooking?” Jongin laughs as he settles down into a chair at his small dining table. He looks at the steaming bowl of soup Chanyeol hands him with awed eyes, like it’s the newest wonder of the world or something. “You sounded so confident the other day.”

“I am confident,” Chanyeol protests, sitting in the other chair with his own bowl. “It’ll knock your pants off.” He glances at Jongin’s bare thighs, swallows, and amends quickly, “Your metaphorical pants, anyway.” 

Jongin laughs, and there’s this terrifyingly knowing look in his eyes, like he can tell Chanyeol finds his legs distracting in a good way. Chanyeol doesn’t look at him, feeling his ears burn, and just blows over a spoonful of the jjigae before eating. 

Jongin is highly appreciative of Chanyeol’s cooking, thanking him and praising him in a way no one has ever really done. Kyungsoo’s not so vocal about things like this, and well, Kyungsoo knows his way around a kitchen just as much as Chanyeol, so good meals are pretty much a staple in their apartment. Baekhyun’s probably the only person who compliments Chanyeol’s prowess, and even then it’s more along the lines of a compliment-wrapped-insult, which is not really the same. Jongin’s bright-eyed, bushy-tailed remarks has not only his ears hot but his wrist, too, spreading warmth throughout his whole body. 

That feeling doesn’t leave him at all the rest of the evening, as Jongin invites him to stay and watch a movie. “Since we missed the one we were gonna go see,” he mumbles cutely, in the way that has started to make Chanyeol want to reach out and ruffle his hair. 

Chanyeol should maybe head home; he still has to work tomorrow, but the thought of the empty apartment and Kyungsoo avoiding him has him agreeing to Jongin’s request. He wants to stay, anyway, Jongin’s pleased smiles and excitement, despite his cold, has him feeling better than he has all week. 

“You really should just go back to bed,” Chanyeol tells him, only a little reproachfully, but Jongin curls up on the couch next to him, closer than they might usually sit, but still with enough space between them to not be too forward, and turns the volume up on the television. 

“This is resting,” he says, grinning. “And I just took some more meds and your jjigae really helped. I feel loads better.” He rubs at his wrist and Chanyeol understands what he’s not saying. Being close like this, it’s healing. 

“Just don’t fall asleep on me,” Chanyeol warns teasingly, and Jongin nods, pulling up the blankets he fetched from his room up around the both of them. 

Jongin doesn’t fall asleep on him, but halfway through the movie, he does somehow inch closer, as they laugh and talk and make fun of the actors on the screen. He’s so warm and his smiles are so bright, and when he tentatively links his fingers with Chanyeol’s under the blanket, Chanyeol doesn’t once think about pulling away. 

“Can you feel that?” Jongin whispers, gently resting his head against Chanyeol’s shoulder, and Chanyeol’s heart is beating loudly in his ears, in time to the gentle pulse of Jongin’s name. 

The bond is singing. It’s happy. Happy like the time Chanyeol’s name finally appeared on Kyungsoo’s wrist and Kyungsoo had climbed into his lap to kiss him firmly on the mouth, whispering _soulmate_ in between each press of their lips. Chanyeol can feel it and for the first time since meeting Jongin, he relishes it, lets it consume him. 

Jongin squeezes his fingers lightly. He says, “I’m happy, too,” and Chanyeol can’t quite say it aloud, but he knows Jongin can feel that he is, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. oh kyungsoo u were doing so well 
> 
> 2\. the chankai in this chapter is one of my fave parts :3
> 
> 3\. thank you again for all your support and all your kinds comments for this fic;;; i got behind in replying so i will do my best to catch up!! ur feedback really makes my day so thank you thank you thank you
> 
> come say hi on [twitter](http://twitter.com/xingkais) | [ask.fm](http://ask.fm/koiyake) | [tumblr](http://koiyake.tumblr.com)


	5. Chapter 5

Chanyeol wakes again the next morning to an empty apartment, but for the first time that week, he doesn’t mind it. He’s content and energized from the best sleep he’s had since his argument with Kyungsoo, and he’s mostly sure it’s because of his night with Jongin; the happiness from his bond with Jongin outweighs the displeasure of the one with Kyungsoo. He’s upset, still, yes, growing even moreso the longer Kyungsoo avoids him, but Jongin’s made it more bearable, and that’s what he needs right now. 

It helps that Jongin’s spammed his phone with about ten messages, announcing that his fever broke and that he feels great today and thanking Chanyeol so much for dinner and a fun night. _We should do that again sometime soon!_ and Chanyeol doesn’t even hesitate before suggesting Jongin come over tonight after work. Kyungsoo will probably be spending another night at work, putting more space between them, and Chanyeol would like to have a nice evening again, without any worries. 

Jongin comes bearing pizza and a bright smile, looking ten times better than he did last night. “Should you be eating pizza after you just had a cold?” Chanyeol chides him, taking the box from his hands and shutting the door behind him. 

“It was just a fever,” Jongin says, stepping out of his shoes and following Chanyeol inside. He’s looking around the place with wide eyes, taking in the artwork that Kyungsoo’s hung on the walls, Chanyeol’s guitars against the wall next to the television. “Am I gonna hear you play someday?” he asks, lightly running his fingers over the strings of one. 

“Maybe,” Chanyeol says. “You could come to one of the open mic nights.” 

“I will,” Jongin says, nodding decisively, and he steps over to the couch to sit down as Chanyeol brings some napkins and cans of beer over from the kitchen. “No Kyungsoo?” 

“He’s working,” Chanyeol says, hoping his voice doesn’t come out as stiff as it does to his own ears, but Jongin seems mostly pleased to know it’s just him, opening the pizza box and eyeing which slice to take for himself. “So,” Chanyeol asks, pulling up Netflix on the television. “What’re we watching?” 

They’re two episodes into a Daredevil marathon when the door to the apartment opens and Kyungsoo walks in, coming to a complete stop at the sight of them. “Oh,” he says, looking at Chanyeol, then at Jongin, and Chanyeol’s chest aches because this is really the first time he’s properly seen Kyungsoo since Monday. He looks tired, smaller than usual in his suit, and his hair isn’t even styled up like it normally is for work. “Sorry for interrupting,” he says, and there’s steel in his voice that cuts through Chanyeol’s heart. He’s glaring at the way Chanyeol’s got his arm around Jongin’s shoulders. 

“You’re not,” Jongin says quickly, moving out of Chanyeol’s casual embrace. “We were just watching a show.”

“Come join us, Kyungsoo,” Chanyeol offers, waving him over, but Kyungsoo continues to stand rooted to his spot, gripping tightly at his work bag over his shoulder. 

He shakes his head. “No, no,” he says, stepping back toward the door and Chanyeol rises to his feet because he’s not letting Kyungsoo escape. “I’m sorry for ruining your little _date_ \--”

“Don’t--Wait, Kyungsoo, you can’t run from this _again_!” Chanyeol exclaims, voice louder than usual and it seems to startle both Jongin and Kyungsoo. Jongin shifts to his feet beside him, hovering behind Chanyeol’s shoulder, and Chanyeol blindly reaches out to grasp his hand. He needs the comfort, the strength. Kyungsoo is watching them closely, a dark, unreadable expression on his face. Chanyeol can usually tell how he’s feeling, what he’s thinking, but other than what Kyungsoo’s already told him, that he’s having trouble adjusting to this new soulmate thing, Chanyeol has no idea what’s on his mind. All he knows right now is that he’s tired of waiting, tired of fighting, and he wants--he _needs_ \--Kyungsoo to talk to him. 

“What do you want?” Kyungsoo says and he probably means to sounds angry, but instead he sounds worn-out, like just the idea of this conversation has exhausted him. 

“I want you to tell me what’s wrong,” Chanyeol says. “I want you to stop avoiding me!” 

“I’m not--” Kyungsoo starts but Chanyeol puts up his free hand to stop him, mutters, “Don’t you dare even think about lying to me. You _have_ been avoiding me. This is the most we’ve talked since Monday night.”

Kyungsoo licks his lips, looking like he’s trying to figure out how to weasel his way out of his situation. His eyes dart over to Jongin for a moment, then drop down to their hands and Chanyeol, a few weeks ago, would’ve let go instantly, wouldn’t have wanted to make Kyungsoo upset, but right now, Kyungsoo is making them _both_ upset, with his avoidance and his hidden anger, and maybe Chanyeol is feeling slightly vindictive; Kyungsoo hasn’t been there for him all week, but Jongin has. 

“Aren’t you going to say anything?” Chanyeol asks, trying to keep his voice soft but failing. The harsh tone has Kyungsoo flinching a bit, and that, at least, is some sort of honest reaction. “You know you’re not the only one who is confused and hurt, Kyungsoo, and all week I’ve been waiting for you to say something and--”

“I didn’t realize sharing you would be so hard!” Kyungsoo shouts, and the silence that rings in the room afterward is nearly deafening. Kyungsoo stares at Chanyeol, open and hurt and maybe a little ashamed, but he’s not glaring anymore and he’s looking at Chanyeol, only Chanyeol, for the first time in what feels like ages. “I thought I could handle it--when it first happened, I thought it’d be okay, we would figure it out, but then you started to actually spend time together and I--I just--” He heaves a deep breath, his narrow shoulders looking even smaller as he slumps in defeat, and when he meets Chanyeol’s eyes this time, they’re plain sad. “Am I not enough?” he asks, and Chanyeol’s wrist is on fire but it’s nothing compared to the ache in his chest. 

He doesn’t know what to say. His mouth feels dry and all he can do is stare back at Kyungsoo and listen to the thudding rush of blood in his ears like that will somehow whisper to him the perfect reply. It doesn’t, of course, but there is Jongin, who squeezes his hand gently to pull Chanyeol back to the surface. There’s a sad sort of look on his face and Chanyeol hates it, hates seeing both of them looking so dejected. 

“I should go,” Jongin says, squeezing his hand once more before he slips away. He picks up his phone from the coffee table and even starts to clean up his own mess before Chanyeol quickly stops him with a soft, “Leave it, it’s okay.” He smiles at Jongin, adds, “Thank you for coming by today.” 

Jongin smiles, too, but it doesn’t quite meet his eyes, and then he’s shuffling out of the room, inclining his head toward Kyungsoo as he passes. There’s the creak of the door opening, then shutting, and then there’s silence again, that stretches thin throughout the air as Chanyeol turns back to Kyungsoo, standing only a few feet away but feeling like he might as well be across the country. 

“Aren’t _you_ going to say anything?” Kyungsoo breaks the silence. He sighs, runs a hand through his floppy hair, and pulls his bag off his shoulder, too, finally moving toward Chanyeol to drop it onto the arm chair closest to him. He grips the the back of the chair like he needs the support to keep standing. Chanyeol misses the warmth and reassure of Jongin’s hand in his. 

The fight is out of him. He doesn’t want to yell or shout anymore. Instead, he slumps back into his spot on the couch and turns off the television, hadn’t even realized it’d still been playing the whole time. “I don’t know what to say, Kyungsoo,” he mutters. “Did you even stop and think how I might feel? Knowing that someone else also has _your_ name on their wrist?” 

Kyungsoo flinches visibly at that, turning away to stare down at the floor. His fingers tighten on the chair for a moment before he lets go entirely and, to Chanyeol’s surprise, comes to sit beside him. A hand hovers over Chanyeol’s knee, careful, uncertain, but then lowers, and just the touch has Chanyeol gasping for air, his bond bursting inside him. “I’m so sorry, Chanyeol,” Kyungsoo says. His voice is soft and gentle and a hundred percent sincere. Chanyeol can feel it. “You’re right. I shouldn’t have acted like I was the only one having to deal with this.”

“It was really lonely, Kyungsoo,” Chanyeol mutters. “You’ve been so busy, and then you kept avoiding the problem, and this week--this week was awful.” 

“I know,” Kyungsoo says. “I just...I know I told you, in the beginning, that it was okay. To meet Jongin, to know him. I just never thought you would actually like him. That it might actually lead somewhere.” His nails are digging into Chanyeol’s knee hard enough that it has Chanyeol actually looking at him. Kyungsoo’s eyes are closed though, and he takes a slow breath through parted lips as he adds, “That scared me.” 

Finally, Chanyeol thinks, finally the truth. It’s all he’s been wanting to hear, what he’s wanted to know. Like that, his will crumbles and he’s pulling Kyungsoo into his arms, pressing his face into the crook of his neck and squeezing tightly the way that would normally have Kyungsoo elbowing him in the ribs as he laughs. Now, though, he hugs back, arms snug around Chanyeol’s waist and his shoulders shake a little in Chanyeol’s embrace. 

“Am I not enough?” he whispers again and Chanyeol blinks back the prickling in his eyes. “Isn’t what we have enough?” 

Chanyeol, a few weeks ago, would have resolutely said yes, but now he remembers Jongin’s smile and the weight of his hand in his, and he no longer has an answer. 

 

Things get better. Over the next couple of days, they talk it out, spend more time together. Kyungsoo comes home after work instead of making excuses to stay behind and they cook dinner together like they used to, what feels like so long ago, and Kyungsoo’s kisses are just as comforting as Chanyeol remembers. Kyungsoo isn’t one to make a big deal out of things, but he keeps apologizing for this, whenever he seems to feel like Chanyeol needs to hear it. He doesn’t, not anymore, but Kyungsoo will say it anyway and follow it up with gentle kisses and _I love you_ and Chanyeol can’t really stay annoyed at him for that. 

He knows Kyungsoo’s still hurt, too, but Chanyeol doesn’t know how to make that better. How can he apologize for having a second soulmate? It’s out of his control. Kyungsoo knows that, no matter how much he might hate it, but he’s trying, trying to accept, trying to understand. “Together,” Chanyeol reminds him, squeezing his hand, “We’ll figure it out together.” 

They talk about Jongin, too, carefully, when Kyungsoo asks, “What is he like? Some of the girls on the team always giggle whenever he’s around.” 

“Not even you can deny he’s cute, Kyungsoo,” Chanyeol says, and Kyungsoo makes such a disgruntled face that Chanyeol laughs, plants a kiss onto his cheek because he’s cute, too, in his own way. “He’s kind of like you,” he says. “Quiet. Shy.” He rolls over onto his side, stretching his legs out in bed, and stares at Kyungsoo. “He reads a lot, and talks about his puppy like its his kid. He’s completely infatuated with his one-year-old niece. He likes Prince of Tennis, too. You guys have that in common.” 

“I didn’t ask about that,” Kyungsoo grumbles lightly, poking Chanyeol in the chest. “Just tell me about him, not match us up.” 

“I can’t help it,” Chanyeol says. He’s always thinking about how similar they are, how different. “Your _his_ soulmate, too, remember?” 

“I remember,” Kyungsoo says quietly and he takes Chanyeol’s right hand in his, rubs his fingers over Jongin’s name curiously like he still can’t believe it’s there. 

Chanyeol wants to ask Kyungsoo more about that, how he feels, how he thinks _Jongin_ feels, knowing Kyungsoo almost wants nothing to do with him. But things are still fragile and he doesn’t want to push Kyungsoo into a corner for an answer again. They need to fix themselves, before Chanyeol thinks he can ever get Kyungsoo to open up properly to Jongin. 

“I really think you guys would get along,” Chanyeol says. He doesn’t mean to sound petulant, but he does, and thankfully Kyungsoo just chuckles a little, meeting his eyes. 

“I believe you,” he says. “I’m just not ready for that.” He looks down at Chanyeol’s wrist again and sighs. “I wasn’t ready for any of this. It’s a lot harder to deal with when it’s actually happening.” 

“Don’t you think it’s been hard for me, too?” Chanyeol murmurs. “You refused to meet Jongin with me, except for that very first time. I invite you, and you make up an excuse. I try to tell you about him, and you avoid the conversation.” Kyungsoo looks a little like Chanyeol’s smacked him, his eyes wide and fingers tightening around Chanyeol’s wrist, but Chanyeol can’t stop now that he’s started. “I’ve been entirely honest with you about every time Jongin and I have spent together, because I don’t want you to feel like I’m cheating on you. _I_ don’t want to feel like that, either.” 

“You were holding hands,” Kyungsoo says, a sharp edge to his voice. 

“Because he’s a friend, now,” Chanyeol says, just as sharply. He pulls his hand out of Kyungsoo’s grip and sits up, running a hand through his hair. “And who else was going to comfort me?” he asks, looking down at Kyungsoo, “You? After you spent all that time ignoring me?” 

Kyungsoo winces. He rubs at his own wrist, where Chanyeol’s name is etched, and drops his head back against his pillow. 

“Look, Kyungsoo,” Chanyeol says. “I love you. I’ll always love you.” He reaches out to take Kyungsoo’s hand, brushes his fingers over his own name. “I don’t know where this thing with Jongin is going. I like spending time with him, but I don’t love him like I love you. I don’t know if I ever will.” 

“And what if you do?” Kyungsoo demands. “What then?” 

“I don’t know,” Chanyeol answers honestly. Kyungsoo bristles, opening his mouth to refute him, but Chanyeol grips his hand tighter and adds, “I just hope that you’ll believe that I still love you, too,” and watches as the anger fades from Kyungsoo’s eyes. “And everything else we’ll figure out together.” 

Kyungsoo is silent for a long time, like he’s turning around this potential future over and over in his head and wondering if it’s worth it. Chanyeol is scared, too, and he’s told Kyungsoo as much. He doesn’t know what’s going to happen, but all he knows is that he hopes Kyungsoo will be there with him every step of the way. 

“Okay,” Kyungsoo finally says, tugging at Chanyeol’s hand until he lies back down. He cups Chanyeol’s face in his hands, breathes against his lips. “Okay.” 

His kiss feels like a promise. A start. 

 

“I hear you’re having soulmate troubles,” Minseok says in way of greeting when Chanyeol answers his phone. 

“Did Baekhyun tell you already?” Chanyeol sighs and Minseok laughs. There are voices in the background and the rush of the wind, making it a little hard to hear. Chanyeol presses his phone a little closer to his ear. 

“He might’ve mentioned it in an email he sent Yixing the other day,” he says. “You should’ve done it yourself.” 

“I didn’t want to bother you guys,” Chanyeol says as he scans the contents of the fridge and the cupboards, looking for a quick snack. Kyungsoo said he was going to bring home food within the hour for dinner, so Chanyeol tries not to give into the urge to cook, pushing aside his hunger to focus on Minseok. “I was gonna email you when things got more...settled.”

“Have they?” 

“A little,” Chanyeol admits. “For awhile there, it was really bad.” He sighs, closing the last cupboard and leaning back against the counter. “I don’t think Kyungsoo and I have ever fought like that before.” 

“Not even when you pranked him junior year and he didn’t talk to you for a week?” 

Chanyeol laughs at that. “That was nothing compared to this,” he says sadly. “How did you deal with it?” he finally asks, realizing he really does need the advice. Some answers. Chanyeol is so lost. 

“I didn’t,” Minseok says with a hollow sort of chuckle. “You know that Han wasn’t interested in it, and well, it’s not like I was keen about him having a soulmate either. I wanted to honor his wishes. If he didn’t want to find Yixing, then I wasn’t gonna make him.” His laugh this time sounds more bitter. “That was probably a mistake.” 

“How come?” 

“I was being selfish,” Minseok sighs. “I’d known about bonds acting up and I could tell Han was getting sick, but I kept telling myself maybe it wasn’t because of the bond, maybe it was just a normal cold--And then, well. You know what happened.” There’s silence for a moment from Minseok, but in the background, Chanyeol can hear Han’s familiar laugh and Yixing shouting at him about something. When Minseok speaks again, he sounds less upset. “When we realized...we knew there wasn’t any other way. Bonds aren’t meant to be ignored.” 

“Yeah, I figured that out, too, the hard way,” Chanyeol says, remembering how he fainted. He didn’t have it nearly as bad as Han did, but the memory of that time is still rough. 

“Kyungsoo loves you, you know,” Minseok says softly. “He loves you so much he let you meet your new soulmate and didn’t try to keep you to himself. It’s not really love, when you do something like that, even if it seems like it might be.” 

Chanyeol never thought of it that way, just how much Kyungsoo was putting on the line letting Chanyeol meet Jongin. He groans, letting his head fall back against one of the cupboards with a slight thud. “This is really hard,” he whines and Minseok laughs. “Kyungsoo might’ve been good about it in the beginning, but now...The things he’s said…” He can’t forget the sound of Kyungsoo’s voice when he’d told him Chanyeol didn’t need to talk to him now, when he had Jongin. Can’t forget the way he shook in his arms when he asked Chanyeol why he wasn’t enough. 

“It’s not easy,” Minseok says. “You just have to give it time, and you have to work at it together. Not just you and Kyungsoo, but the new soulmate, too.”

“Jongin,” Chanyeol supplies, a little defiantly. 

“Yes, Jongin,” Minseok says, a placating tone to his voice. “You have to decide how to make it work, how to share your lives together, or keep them separate, if that’s what you want.”

“What did you guys do?” Chanyeol asks. 

“Ah, well, I think that’s probably a story for another time,” Minseok says vaguely, and as Chanyeol starts to protest, there’s shuffling on the other end and Han exclaims, “Long story short, don’t get drunk and have a threesome the first night you meet your soulmate--” 

“ _Han_!” 

“It worked out though, didn’t it?” Yixing says pleasantly as it sounds like Minseok has pulled Han into a chokehold. Chanyeol is still trying to process this new bit of information that it takes him a moment to realize Yixing’s spoken again. “Will you be okay?” 

“I think so,” he answers after a moment. He definitely feels better than he has in ages, now that Kyungsoo is talking to him and things with Jongin are looking up. “I hope so.” 

“You will be,” Yixing says sagely. “Everything will work out, you’ll see.” 

 

The Starbucks is packed on the following Wednesday morning, but Chanyeol easily finds Jongin sitting in the corner, staring at his phone in his hands. A smile pulls at Chanyeol’s lips just at the sight of him and he weaves around people getting their daily dose of caffeine, pulls the chair across from Jongin out to sit. 

“Hey,” he says, grinning, and Jongin jumps a little in his seat, clearly not even noticing he’d arrived. He’s so cute. “I haven’t heard from you in a few days. I’m glad you wanted to meet up.” He eyes Jongin’s drink. “That doesn’t have coffee in it, does it?” 

Jongin cracks a little smile as he swirls the straw around in his pinkish drink. “No,” he says, “You know how I feel about that stuff.” He wrinkles his nose, then pushes the other cup set to the left toward Chanyeol. “For you. I think I remembered your order right.” 

“Thanks,” Chanyeol says warmly, graciously accepting his drink and nodding as he sips on it to let Jongin know it’s perfect. “So, what’s up? How’ve you been?” He sets his drink down. “I know the last time we saw each other it was, well…” 

“I’ve been good,” Jongin says. “Perfectly healthy, too. Just a little busy, making up for all the work I fell behind on last week.” 

“I’d been wondering,” Chanyeol says. “It felt a little lonely lately without your usual texts.” 

“Sorry,” Jongin says, not looking at him, and Chanyeol frowns, feeling like something is wrong. It’s different than the time Jongin was late to the movie, but just as insistent, an unpleasantness settling in the pit of his stomach. 

“You don’t have to apologize for that,” Chanyeol says with a light chuckle. “I’m just glad to see you’re all right.” 

“Are you?” Jongin whispers, glancing up at him, and again, Chanyeol doesn’t understand. He’s about to say as much when Jongin says, out of nowhere, “I don’t think we should see each other anymore.” 

For a moment, all Chanyeol seems to hear is the noisiness of the coffee shop, the chatter of the group of girls at the table behind him, the barista shouting out a name for pickup, the old Adele song playing on the radio speakers. Then, suddenly, Jongin’s words cut through everything like a knife, sharp and painful and straight into his heart. “Wh-What?” he breathes, because he can’t have heard correctly. 

“I think we should stop seeing each other,” Jongin repeats, his voice steady. His eyes aren’t though, Chanyeol realizes in his haze; he won’t look at Chanyeol directly, and whenever he does meet Chanyeol’s gaze, there’s clear sadness there. “We have to stop spending time together.” 

“Why?” Chanyeol says, and he can’t even bring himself to raise his voice. He feels as small as Kyungsoo had looked the other day, when he’d come home to find Chanyeol and Jongin. 

“I like you a lot, Chanyeol, I really do,” Jongin says, and he’s gripping his cup so tightly in his hands it’s a wonder it hasn’t burst open and spilled all over the table. “You’re the kind of person I always hoped my soulmate would be, you know?” He laughs a little but it turns soppy within a few seconds and he stops abruptly, dropping his eyes again. “But I can’t--I can’t come in between you and Kyungsoo, not after everything that’s happened, I just can’t.” 

“Jongin--” 

“The two of you really love each other,” Jongin says, a little louder, cutting over Chanyeol. “That’s more important than soul bonds, don’t you think?”

“I don’t--I don’t understand,” Chanyeol says. “We’ve been doing really well.” He’s been so hopeful, lately, after his phone call with Minseok and Yixing, and this feels like someone’s just pulled the rug out from under him, knocked him just as off balance as he’d been the morning he found Jongin’s name on his wrist. 

“It’s been better than I could’ve ever imagined, honestly,” Jongin says. His eyes are watery now, and Chanyeol can’t believe he’s been the cause of Jongin’s tears twice now. “I really, really like you, Chanyeol, I think I might even--” He catches himself quickly then, sniffling a little as he rubs his eyes, and Chanyeol’s wrist burns at the redacted implication. “Well, that doesn’t matter anymore,” he says quickly as he stands, pulling his work bag over his shoulder. “I want you to be happy, more than anything, and you already were, before I showed up, so...This is it.” He smiles at Chanyeol, but it doesn’t light up his face at all the way it usually does, the way it usually makes Chanyeol’s heart warm.

“Thank you, for everything,” Jongin says, and then he’s gone, leaving Chanyeol feeling hopelessly empty and cold and wondering how things could’ve taken a turn such as this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. pls don't kill me
> 
> 2\. as always, thank u so so much for reading and commenting. honestly it makes me so happy to see all ur comments. i've been sitting on this fic for so long that it's encouraging;;; so thank you, truly. ❤
> 
> come say hi on [twitter](http://twitter.com/xingkais) | [ask.fm](http://ask.fm/koiyake) | [tumblr](http://koiyake.tumblr.com)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello everyone! i'm sorry this is so so late omg rl stuff has been kicking my butt the past few weeks so i hadn't had the time to even think about this. but it's break now, so i will hopefully be back to a regular posting schedule. there's actually not much left to go out of everything that i've already had written! all of your words of encouragement have meant so much, i can't even begin to tell you. once i finish the fic i'm currently working on, i believe i'll be back to continuing this to the end. thank you again for your patience and your kind support. you're the best. ❤

At first it feels like a bad dream. Chanyeol goes on through that day waiting for new texts from Jongin, complaining about the article he’s editing or how Sehun forgot to buy milk again or sending a photo of the little cactus plant he’d bought a week ago for his desk. But the hours go on and there is nothing, Chanyeol’s phone remaining horribly silent where it sits next to his monitor. 

By the time Chanyeol gets home that day, he’s gone over his conversation with Jongin maybe a hundred times and attempted just as much to send him a message or give him a call, only to back off at the last minute. He can’t stop thinking about it and it’s draining him; all he wants is to lie in bed and maybe figure out what went wrong. 

He doesn’t expect Kyungsoo to be home, but his shoes are in the doorway and the lights are on and some Sia song is blasting from the kitchen. Kyungsoo’s always liked listening to music when he cooks. Chanyeol toes off his shoes and stumbles into the apartment, still surprised that Kyungsoo is there, but knowing that this is his way of showing he’s trying. 

“Wow,” Chanyeol says as he walks into the kitchen, taking in the few dishes that are already done and sitting on the counter. “What’s all this?” 

Kyungsoo whirls around to greet him, but the smile on his face drops the instance he sees Chanyeol. “What happened to you?” he demands, quickly setting aside the bowl in his hands to rush up to him, easily sliding a hand around the back of his neck to draw Chanyeol’s face down to his height. 

“W-What?”

“Chanyeol, do you think I can’t tell when something’s wrong? You wear your heart on your sleeve, and right now you look like someone ran you over. Are you okay?” Kyungsoo says and he’s staring into Chanyeol’s eyes with that sort of soul-searching look he gets when he’s concerned and Chanyeol doesn’t know...can’t figure out how to explain it to him, what’s happened. After everything, after all the careful building up they’ve been doing, now this? 

“Are you _crying_?” Kyungsoo breathes and Chanyeol jerks away so fast he almost knocks Kyungsoo to the floor. 

“What--No--I just, fuck,” Chanyeol says, rubbing at his face and trying not to let his emotions get the best of him, but it feels like he can’t control it; his right wrist has been agonizing all day and now...now that he’s finally home, finally has the time to really think about it, it’s too much. 

“Chanyeol,” Kyungsoo says, taking his hand in both of his, gently smoothing his thumb over his name on Chanyeol’s wrist. Like always, it helps Chanyeol breathe, calms him down, and he lets Kyungsoo tug him over to the table so they can sit. Chanyeol pulls his work bag over his shoulder, sets it aside and slumps. “What the fuck happened?” 

“Jongin...Jongin broke up with me,” he says finally, then as the words reach his own ears, he barks out a delirious laugh. “Broke up? What am I saying? We weren’t even dating. We weren’t even _anything_ really, and yet--”

Chanyeol lets out a shaky breath, rubs at his eyes. He refuses to cry. Kyungsoo’s hands tighten around his own and he scoots a little closer. “Tell me everything,” he says, and honestly, Chanyeol has gone over this so many times already that he doesn’t want to relive it again, but he knows he can’t keep it from Kyungsoo, either. 

Kyungsoo listens quietly as Chanyeol recounts again what happened that morning, and by the end of it, he’s even more drained and his eyes hurt from all the tears he still refuses to shed. He doesn’t understand why he feels this upset. Isn’t this what he wanted in the first place? No Jongin, just Kyungsoo? 

“He really said all of that?” Kyungsoo asks, and Chanyeol can’t do anything but nod. “Are you--Are you okay?” 

Chanyeol shrugs a shoulder. “I don’t know,” he answers truthfully. He’s hurt and upset and confused and he isn’t sure which one of these feelings is most intense, can’t figure out a way to explain all three at once. 

Kyungsoo looks like he wants to push further, maybe say exactly what Chanyeol had been thinking minutes earlier, that this is what they wanted, isn’t it? Chanyeol expects him to say it, but all Kyungsoo does is give his hands another squeeze and a soft, heartwarming smile. “Food always helps. I made your favorite,” he says, standing up. “Do you want to go wash up and we can maybe watch Pacific Rim again, you mentioned it the other day and I feel like--” 

Chanyeol cuts him off with a kiss, rising halfway to his feet to meet Kyungsoo’s lips, and Kyungsoo lets out a surprised little laugh, but kisses him back. “Thank you,” Chanyeol whispers when he pulls away, not entirely sure what he’s thanking Kyungsoo for, but already he feels better, knowing Kyungsoo is here, trying to comfort him and not saying what Chanyeol thought he would, which he’s only sure would’ve made him feel worse. 

Smiling, Kyungsoo pats his cheek, and Chanyeol leaves him to finish cooking, heading down the hall to the bedroom. He sits down at the edge of the bed, putting his head in his hands and take a few deep, calming breaths. Jongin’s pretty smile fills his mind the second he closes his eyes, but it soon fades away to that sad look Chanyeol had seen that morning as he sat across from him and told him they shouldn’t see each other anymore. 

“Fuck,” Chanyeol mumbles, rubbing at his face as he refuses to cry, refuses to think about why his heart aches more than the searing pain in his wrist. 

 

Just as suddenly as Jongin had woven into Chanyeol’s life, that’s how suddenly he is gone. Except Chanyeol never realized _just_ how much Jongin had changed things in the short while they’d been spending time together. So much reminds him of Jongin, and his absence is felt in the silence of his phone messages, the episodes of Daredevil still queued up on Netflix that they never got to finish. It feels like nowhere is safe, nowhere is empty of thoughts of Jongin, of little things that have Chanyeol remembering how his eyes lit up when he laughed or the warmth of his hand when he held onto Chanyeol’s for the first time. 

He doesn’t know what to do. He’s not even sure how to feel. On the one hand, this is what he wanted, to put everything back to normal. On the other, Chanyeol misses Jongin more than he could’ve ever expected. His right wrist aches over the next two days, a constant reminder of what happened, everything Jongin said to him. 

In some ways, Chanyeol’s grateful that Baekhyun shows up at his office during lunch on Friday, dragging Chanyeol out to the nearest Chipotle and paying for them both, like Chanyeol saving the eight bucks will make him feel better. It does, a little, but Chanyeol just tells Baekhyun thanks and slowly unwraps his burrito as Baekhyun eyes him for a moment, then says, as blunt as ever, “So, I hear you got dumped.” 

Chanyeol laughs derisively, licks at his lips. “Is it really being dumped when we weren’t even dating?” he asks. 

“He dumped your friendship then,” Baekhyun amends and Chanyeol sighs. 

“I’m not even sure we had that, either,” Chanyeol says without really thinking. He knows he’s being melodramatic; he’d called Jongin his friend days ago when he’d talked with Kyungsoo about him. Jongin is his friend. 

“From everything you’ve told me and what I’ve heard from Kyungsoo, you definitely were friends,” Baekhyun insists. “He was kind enough to come tell you why he wanted to stop spending time with you instead of just cutting you out of his life with no explanation.” 

“I’m starting to think that might’ve hurt less, to be honest,” Chanyeol mumbles. 

“It wouldn’t have,” Baekhyun says decisively, and Chanyeol’s pretty sure he’s speaking from experience. His fierce look softens a bit then, as Chanyeol looks up at him, and he adds, “I really am sorry, though.” 

Chanyeol shrugs a shoulder. “I’ll get over it.” 

“No, you won’t,” Baekhyun says. “It’s only been a few days and it’s already eating you alive, I can tell.” He takes a big bite of his burrito, getting guac all over his lips that he wipes away rather obscenely with his tongue. A girl sitting at the table over is staring at him and Baekhyun gives her a small smirk before turning back to Chanyeol. “I can’t even imagine what Jongin is going through, being so close to both his soulmates but not actually having either one.” 

Chanyeol drops his burrito back into its bowl with a full-bodied wince. He hadn’t even once thought of that. Not once. All he’s been thinking about is himself, how he feels, what he should be doing, whether or not he should accept Jongin’s decision or try to fight it. He hasn’t come to any conclusions, and he hasn’t even once, taken a moment to think of how horrible Jongin probably feels. At least Chanyeol has Kyungsoo, whose presence cancels out the ache in his right wrist. Jongin...Jongin is completely alone. 

“Fuck,” he groans, slumping back against his chair. “Why did you have to say that?” 

“Honestly, I thought you’d already realized it,” Baekhyun says, only looking minimally apologetic. “That’s why I figured you wouldn’t get over it. Why don’t you just go talk to him? Tell him this isn’t what you want?” 

“But--It might be what I want.” 

Baekhyun fixes him with a look so disbelieving, Chanyeol feels like a little kid getting caught in a lie. “Chanyeol, if that’s what it really was, you wouldn’t have let me buy you lunch and you definitely wouldn’t look like you just crawled out of a cave.” 

Chanyeol’s hand flies up to his chin, rubs over the rough hairs. “I just haven’t felt like shaving the past few days,” he says defensively. 

“Because you’re _lovesick_.” 

“I’m not--” Chanyeol says loudly, cutting himself off quickly when he realizes just how loud, and then hisses, leaning over the table, “I’m not _lovesick_!” 

“You’re miserable, Chanyeol,” Baekhyun says, and Chanyeol can’t even refute it, can’t even protest that Baekhyun’s wrong, because he is. It’s different than the way he felt when Kyungsoo was avoiding him, but it hurts all the same, and Chanyeol doesn’t know why he’s even pretending to act like nothing is wrong when everything is. “I’m not saying you’re in love with him,” Baekhyun continues, “but you clearly like him a lot, more than you’re letting on, and what Jongin said the other day is really bothering you.” 

“I don’t know what to do about it,” Chanyeol finally admits. “We were--We were having a good time together, I thought. I do like him, Baekhyun. He’s so cute and he’s fun to be around.” 

“You never even introduced us, you asshole,” Baekhyun says, kicking Chanyeol under the table. “I can’t believe he dumped you before I got to meet him.” 

“Will you stop saying that?” Chanyeol groans, but Baekhyun just grins at him. Chanyeol sighs, picks at the aluminum foil around his half-eaten burrito. “Do you think he’d listen to me if I went to talk to him?” 

“Do you know what it is you want?”

“I--Well--Maybe,” Chanyeol fumbles and Baekhyun rolls his eyes. 

“He can’t take you seriously if you don’t even know what you want, Chanyeol,” he says. “You need to figure that out first.” 

“I know,” Chanyeol says, slumping again. Why did everything have to be so difficult? Chanyeol’s so tired of thinking. 

“You should just ask yourself this,” Baekhyun says, resting his elbow on the table, his chin in his hand. “If Jongin wasn’t your soulmate, and just a friend, would you want to lose him? Everything else--the soulmate stuff, Kyungsoo, whether or not he loves you--forget about that. As friends, would you want to lose him?” He picks up his burrito again and takes another big bite. “If the answer is no, then, well, you know what you should do.” 

Chanyeol’s head is spinning. His gut is telling him he already knows the answer, but it’s not as easy as Baekhyun makes it out to be, forgetting all of those other things. Despite that, he knows Baekhyun is right. “How is it that you’re giving me soulmate advice when you don’t even have one?” Chanyeol demands, and Baekhyun sits up a little straighter, slowly smirks. 

“ _Well_ , actually…” he says, raising a brow and waiting for Chanyeol to put the pieces together. It doesn’t take very long either, Chanyeol gasping in surprise and dropping his burrito back down in favor of grabbing Baekhyun’s hand and turning it over to see his wrist. Baekhyun laughs because it’s empty, but helpfully holds out his left wrist instead, where clear black ink is etched onto his skin. 

“When did this happen?” Chanyeol demands, trying to twist Baekhyun’s hand so he can read the name properly. “Who is Jongdae??” 

“Fuck if I know,” Baekhyun say, pulling his hand back. He stares at his wrist for a moment before he takes a long sip from his drink. “I’ve never heard the name before. I even Facebook searched but there’s a surprisingly long list of people named Jongdae and none of them are in the city!”

“Maybe he’s got his security set to hide from stalkers like you,” Chanyeol says and Baekhyun kicks him under the table again. 

“I’m not a _stalker_!” Baekhyun says loudly, drawing the attention of at least half the people in the restaurant but he doesn’t seem to notice, or care. 

Chanyeol just laughs, amused, and leans back in his seat. He’s glad to have something else to think about now, something that doesn’t have anything to do with him and his own soulmates. “Well, whoever he is, he must be close by if the name finally popped up. Maybe you’ll run into him tomorrow out of nowhere.” 

“Yeah, maybe,” Baekhyun says and he suddenly sounds much more subdued, staring down at his burrito with a slight frown. Baekhyun being uncharacteristically quiet is always a cause for concern, but before Chanyeol has the chance to ask what’s wrong, he says, “You know, I kinda thought I’d never get it. We’re nearly thirty, I thought I’d just be an anomaly or something and be forever soulmate-less.” 

“Hey, Jongin’s name showed up out of nowhere; it didn’t care about age,” Chanyeol points out, trying to comfort him. It’s not often Baekhyun talks about this, so when he does, it’s because it’s really bothering him. 

“I guess,” he says with a shrug. “But have you heard of people in their fifties getting their soulmates? It doesn’t happen that late.” 

“Well, you’re not fifty, are you?” Chanyeol laughs. “If it’d come then, I’d say you were the anomaly. Maybe this Jongdae guy was out of the country or something and there was no chance for you to meet him until now. Soulmates work in mysterious ways, remember?”

Baekhyun nods, but says nothing, falling into another lull. Chanyeol frowns at him, gives his calf a light nudge with his shoe under the table. “Hey, are you okay?” he asks when Baekhyun jumps in his seat. 

“Yeah,” he says, laughs. It doesn’t sound as obnoxious as usual, which is dead giveaway. “I guess I’m kind of nervous,” he admits after a moment, rubbing at his wrist. 

“You? Baekhyun Byun? Nervous?” Chanyeol says exaggeratedly, trying to draw out a reaction from his friend that isn’t so sad. If they weren’t in public, Chanyeol could give him a hug, maybe, even if Baekhyun would just elbow his way out of it, but there’s still people sending them odd looks due to Baekhyun’s noisiness, that this is the best he can do for now to try and cheer him up. “What has the world come to?”

“Shut up!” Baekhyun exclaims, rising to the bait. “I get nervous! I sort of gave up on meeting my soulmate, you know? I accepted that it might not ever happen.” He sighs, staring down at his wrist again, like he’s not sure what to do with it. “And like, I was okay with that, overall. I figured maybe I could meet someone anyway, like Minseok and Han, but now…” 

“Hey,” Chanyeol says softly, reaching over the table to squeeze Baekhyun’s hand. “It’ll be okay,” he says, smiling. “ _You’ll_ be okay. It’s this Jongdae guy I’m worried about, having to put up with you.” 

“Fuck off,” Baekhyun laughs, snatching his hand away, and Chanyeol grins, glad to see he’s more or less back to normal. 

“If you ever do find out who he is, I can go with you to meet him, if you want,” Chanyeol offers, because despite his playfulness, he knows Baekhyun is still probably anxious about this. He wants to help however he can, and, well, concerning himself with Baekhyun’s soulmate problems makes it easier to forget about his own. 

Baekhyun squints at him for a moment, then snorts, shaking his head. “No, thanks,” he says, picking up his burrito again. “Your dumbo ears will just scare him away.” 

Baekhyun’s loud squeal when Chanyeol leans over the table to pinch the back of his neck practically gets them kicked out of the Chipotle, but at least he’s laughing again as they part ways, and Chanyeol can wonder who this Jongdae Kim is and whether he’ll be a good enough match for Baekhyun instead of wondering if he lost his own chance with Jongin. 

 

Kyungsoo is already home when Chanyeol arrives later that day, lounging on the couch with his laptop on his thighs, the click-clacking noise of the keys almost louder than the sound of the television in the background. He’s got the newest Mad Max playing, but he doesn’t seem to be watching, eyes focused on his computer screen so intently he doesn’t even notice Chanyeol’s in the room until he flops right down onto Kyungsoo’s outstretched legs. 

“Christ--Chanyeol--don’t do that,” he exclaims, yanking his feet from under Chanyeol’s butt and kicking him in the side. Chanyeol just laughs loudly, tugs lightly at Kyungsoo’s ankles so he can rest his legs out over his lap. He’s still frowning at Chanyeol disgruntledly, but he looks more adorable than anything, wearing his thick glasses and his hair flopping into his face. 

“Nice to see you, too,” Chanyeol says, grinning, and Kyungsoo’s annoyed expression easily shifts into a soft smile. 

“Hey,” he says in an equally soft voice, digs his toes into Chanyeol’s thighs teasingly. “Are you feeling better today?” 

Chanyeol wishes everyone would stop asking him this, would stop acting like Jongin died or something. Jongin isn’t dead. He just doesn’t want anything to do with Chanyeol. That’s all. Chanyeol looks down at Kyungsoo’s ankles, wondering how to answer, but then Kyungsoo jabs him with his feet, hard. 

“Tell me,” he says when Chanyeol looks up at him. “We’re--We said we need to talk more about how we feel, remember? Don’t hide it if you feel bad.” 

Chanyeol lets out a little laugh, nodding, because Kyungsoo is right. Ever since their fight, they’ve been doing as much as they can to be honest with each other. No more secrets, no more hiding how they really feel. It hasn’t been easy, sure, but it’s been worth it, to know how Kyungsoo feels, to know he can tell Kyungsoo everything that bothers him without worrying that he’ll be brickwalled afterward. 

“It still sucks, honestly,” he finally admits, sighing. He pokes at the bottom of Kyungsoo’s foot and Kyungsoo almost kicks him in the face as he shrinks away, ticklish. Chanyeol wants to continue, make him laugh, make him stop staring at him with worry etched into his dark eyes, but instead he adds, “I don’t feel better, I don’t know if I’ll even be able to unless I get the chance to talk to Jongin again and tell him--I don’t even know what I want to tell him.” He laughs again, hollow, and runs a hand through his hair, closing his eyes as he rests his head on the couch, “Everything's a mess.” 

There’s a moment of rustling from the other end of the couch, the tiny click of a laptop closing and papers being moved around. “You know, I--well, I talked with Jongin today,” Kyungsoo says suddenly, and Chanyeol’s eyes fly open in surprise. He’s not sure what he expected Kyungsoo to say in reply but it was definitely not this. “We work together, remember?” Kyungsoo says when Chanyeol continues to stare at him, and Chanyeol knew this, he did, but somehow it completely slipped his mind. That while Chanyeol has been wanting to see Jongin again, Kyungsoo was at work, seeing exactly how Jongin’s been this whole time. 

“Is he--Did he--I mean--” Chanyeol doesn’t even know what he wants. Does he want to know if Jongin asked about him? If Jongin misses him? Does he want to know if Jongin is okay? Baekhyun’s words from their lunch have plagued him all day and he can’t shake it now, either, wondering if Jongin’s even well enough to go to work when he’s wrenched himself so quickly from one soulmate and rarely has the other around. Then again, maybe just having Kyungsoo in the same building as him is enough. Chanyeol hadn’t thought about it much before, but Kyungsoo and Jongin probably saw each other much more than Chanyeol ever saw Jongin. 

As if Kyungsoo can read his mind he says, “It’s the first time I’ve seen him in awhile. We don’t work in the same department. There was a meeting today, though, that lasted most of the afternoon, and he was there, so--afterward, I stopped by to say hi.” 

“Oh,” Chanyeol says, not looking at Kyungsoo, not really looking at anything. His mind feels a little fuzzy. 

“He--He doesn’t look very good, Chanyeol,” Kyungsoo admits, and Chanyeol squeezes his eyes shut again because that’s what he was worried about hearing. “I just wanted to apologize to him about how I acted the last time I saw him, and he said it was fine. Honestly, he looked surprised I was talking to him at all.” 

“Can you blame him?” Chanyeol asks with a weak chuckle, finally turning to Kyungsoo who smirks back. 

“I know I was an asshole, okay?” he says, jabbing Chanyeol with his toes again. “That’s why I wanted to apologize. And because he looked like he was going to pass out at any moment during that meeting.” 

Chanyeol winces, clenches his fingers around Kyungsoo’s ankle where he’d rested his hands. “This is so stupid--He could really--Fuck.” 

“Hey,” Kyungsoo says, and he’s pulling his feet out of Chanyeol’s lap to instead climb into it himself, grabbing Chanyeol’s face in his hands to look at him directly. “This isn’t your fault, okay? What he did--He decided on his own. He didn’t even give you a chance to figure out if you wanted it, too.” 

“That doesn’t mean he should suffer alone,” Chanyeol snaps back. “I keep thinking that I should be happy about it--that he took himself out of the picture, because that’s--that’s what we wanted, right? But now he’s hurting and I’m hurting but at least I have _you_ and when I’m with you everything is wonderful because we’re fucking soulmates but Jongin--Fuck, who does Jongin have?”

Chanyeol doesn’t realize he’d started crying until Kyungsoo is shushing him gently, thumbs wiping away the tears around his eyes. “You’re right,” Kyungsoo whispers, surprising him. “You’re right, but if this is what he wants, can you change his mind? Do you _want_ to change his mind?” 

“I don’t--I don’t know,” Chanyeol says sadly, once again hopelessly lost. He sniffles, rubbing at his nose, and leans forward to press a kiss to Kyungsoo’s cheek, an apology, thanks. “I’m going to shower, okay?” 

“Chanyeol--” 

It’s easy to pull Kyungsoo out of his lap and onto the couch so he can stand, but Kyungsoo still catches his wrist before he can move away. “I’m fine,” he says, looking down at him. “Or I will be,” he amends, smiling for effect. “Thanks for telling me about Jongin,” he adds, squeezing Kyungsoo’s wrist before he heads down the hall, knowing he’s done just as well of a job convincing Kyungsoo as he’s done himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> since it's been so long and i haven't had a chance to reply to comments bc i'm a failure, i thought i'd address a couple of things ppl have mentioned/asked about in the comments! 
> 
> 1\. when i first started this, i had toyed with the idea of writing through all chankaisoo’s povs…but it’d been a long long time since i’d done switching povs and i wasn’t confident about it. for a fic like this, it definitely might have helped to get more insight about what kyungsoo and jongin is feeling, but as it is, everything we learn is from chanyeol. so that’s why a lot of ur questions about why kaisoo haven’t talked, or wondering if kyungsoo should discuss his feelings with xiulayhan or w/e just...it won’t come up unless it’s mentioned to chanyeol/chanyeol witnesses it
> 
> 2\. some insight though: kyungsoo is not avoiding jongin maliciously. none of kyungsoo’s intentions are mean. i hope that comes across in the fic despite it being through chanyeol’s pov. kyungsoo is just Very Confused. not only is he having to come to terms with chanyeol having another soulmate, kyungsoo has to come to terms with realizing he, himself, is someone else’s soulmate. is he handling things in the right way? probably not. should he give jongin a chance? definitely lol. 
> 
> but kyungsoo, as a very private person, is in a space where he can only concentrate on one thing at a time, and the concept of having to directly talk to jongin in a soulmates way is far more terrifying than letting chanyeol meet him first, bc he never really expected that to go anywhere. he thought it’d be okay. i hope that makes sense. he and jongin might work together, but they’re not friends. jongin is smart enough to realize what kyungsoo’s doing and he keeps his distance (even though he doesn't want to) 
> 
> 3\. another thing is the soul bonds. admittedly a lot of this i came up with as i went along, but i do want to clarify that soul bonds affect everyone differently and there are a lot of factors. for example, han and minseok. han got incredibly sick when he didn’t meet yixing bc minseok isn’t his other “real” soul mate (remember they don’t have e/o’s names on their wrists). chanyeol got sick avoiding jongin, but chanyeol also has kyungsoo around all the time and has his name on his wrist, so he didn’t experience nearly the same level of effects as han. kaisoo might not spend a lot of time together, but they Are in e/o’s proximity nearly everyday, which sates some of the soul bond’s needs, which is why jongin hasn’t, well, died. lol
> 
> the soul bonds in this verse also come up on wrists at various times, due to various elements. at least that’s what i came up with in my head lol. aka, jongin got chansoo name’s together bc chansoo, at that time, were already together. jongin was able to be fine with their names bc they weren’t in the same area--once he moved close enough to meet them that was when the bonds started to hurt. that’s when chanyeol got jongin’s name. the bond, too, “knows”--kyungsoo, who has had the most trouble with accepting jongin/accepting chanyeol’s 2nd soulmate, still hasn't gotten jongin’s name. the bond "knows" he wasn't ready, basically. will he ever be? will he ever get jongin's name? only time will tell tbh 
> 
> jongin and chanyeol, by nature in this verse, are more welcoming/more open to soulmates/meeting people, and it plays a factor in why they got their names more easily. anyway basically i’m saying nothing in this verse is like Set in Stone. everything varies person to person. soul bonds can also disappear over time (but people could still stay together if they wanted), soul bonds can be just platonic friends (like yura and her soulmate), etc. etc. 
> 
> 4\. i hope that clears up some stuff! if u ever have questions about anything please let me know. and i'll try to be better about replying to comments ;_; 
> 
> 5\. thank you again for reading! i hope u enjoyed the chapter! ❤
> 
> come say hi on [twitter](http://twitter.com/xingkais) | [ask.fm](http://ask.fm/koiyake) | [tumblr](http://koiyake.tumblr.com)


	7. Chapter 7

Chanyeol thinks a lot about what both Baekhyun and Kyungsoo told him over the next couple of days. It’s constantly there, an insistent nudge in the back of his mind similar to the way Jongin’s name on his right wrist still aches. He knows he’s probably overthinking everything, that things like this can’t be laid out in simple pro/con tables or calculated with a complex equation he learned back in one of his math courses. It can’t be fixed with a quick update the way he takes care of coding errors at work everyday. This is more than that, this is his life, these are his feelings, and Jongin’s and Kyungsoo’s, too, and Chanyeol wants to do what is best for everyone. 

Kyungsoo tries to distract him, keeping him occupied over the weekend with plenty of things to do around the apartment. They’re both pretty good about keeping their space clean, but it’s nice to spend an afternoon taking all his frustration out scrubbing the kitchen floor while Kyungsoo sings Bruno Mars songs at the top of his lungs as he organizes their pantry. If they get distracted making out against the fridge, that’s good, too, reminding Chanyeol of what Kyungsoo had told him weeks ago, when Jongin’s name first appeared on his skin. That no matter what happened with Jongin, Kyungsoo would always be there for him.

It’s what Chanyeol needs to balance out the storm in his head. He still can’t shake what Jongin said to him, can’t figure out entirely what he should do, but as the days go on, he finds it easier to accept what’s happened and not feel completely upset every time he remembers that day, the look on Jongin’s face. Baekhyun helps, too, with his constant updates about his soulmate search. 

“There was a new barista at the Starbucks I always go to and I wondered if maybe that was him, right? But nope, though he did give me his number anyway,” Baekhyun tells him when he calls Monday night to complain. “So I guess if I don’t meet my soulmate, I’ve got a fallback.” 

“I think what I’ve learned is that you’ll meet your soulmate when you least expect it,” Chanyeol says, thinking back to when he ran into Jongin for the first time. “Don’t be so aggressive that _you_ end up scaring him off.”

“As if that could ever happen,” Baekhyun scoffs. “He’ll fall for me instantly, you’ll see.” 

Chanyeol decides it’s best to let Baekhyun think what he wants. 

Toward the end of the week, Kyungsoo stays late at work to finish up on a project, so Chanyeol decides to stop by with dinner. He’s made his favorites and packed them up into tupperware because Kyungsoo always enjoys home-cooked meals over eating out, especially when he’s busy and can’t be home himself to eat with Chanyeol. It’s been awhile since Chanyeol’s even stopped by the office, but he stops to talk with Seulgi and Yoona on his way up to Kyungsoo’s office, catching up easily and navigating the busy floor like it hasn’t been weeks since his last visit. Junmyeon catches him on his way out and they make plans to have dinner sometime in the coming week, and Chanyeol is grinning as he reaches Kyungsoo’s office, even more pleased with his decision to come by. 

That feeling, the happiness, the grin on his face, all vanish at once the second he walks into Kyungsoo’s office and finds him sitting at his desk with Jongin, of all people, laughing as they look over something spread over the polished table top. There’s the smile Chanyeol keeps thinking about on Jongin’s face, the one that easily morphs into that look of utter sadness on the day Jongin ended everything, and Kyungsoo...Kyungsoo who was so against this, against Jongin, is acting like this isn’t the same person who came into their lives out of nowhere and maybe, possibly, entirely crushed Chanyeol’s heart. 

“Chanyeol!” Kyungsoo says, pulling him out of his painful thoughts, and he’s smiling at him from across the room, even as he looks surprised to see him. He casts a quick glance toward Jongin, then back, and adds, “Hey, come in. I didn’t know you’d be coming.”

“I brought dinner,” Chanyeol says, wincing at the wooden sound of his voice. He clears his throat as he shuffles inside, gripping at the handle of the tote bag he’d put all the food in like it’s a lifeline. He’s not looking at Kyungsoo but at Jongin, who has frozen in his spot by Kyungsoo’s desk, his back straight as a board, shoulders stiff. “Are you busy?” 

“No, no, it’s fine,” Kyungsoo says, the wheels of his chair squeaking as he stands up and starts to make room on the desk. “Thanks for stopping by, Jongin,” he adds, smiling up at him and effectively pulling Jongin out of his stupor as he relaxes and offers a tiny smile back. “This looks great so far.” 

“Thanks,” Jongin mumbles, shuffling together some papers and sliding them into a folder. 

Chanyeol blurts out, “How are you?” before Jongin can leave, before he can stop himself and consider the consequences. From the corner of his eye he can see Kyungsoo glancing between them before settling on Chanyeol, and Chanyeol does his best to ignore it. “You--um, it’s--It’s good to see you,” Chanyeol adds after a moment when Jongin doesn’t answer. 

He finally looks at Chanyeol then, and Chanyeol doesn’t like the sort of hunted bunny look on his face. Chanyeol’s wrists are both aching now, so close to both of his soulmates like this after so long, and Jongin’s name is painful, even though it’s nothing compared to his own urge to reach over and touch him, ruffle his hair, _something_. 

“You--You, too,” Jongin says finally, even if it doesn’t look much like he’s glad to see Chanyeol at all, Chanyeol is pleased to hear him speak, to actually look at him and acknowledge him instead of running away. “I’ve been okay,” he adds after a moment, chewing on his bottom lip. “Busy, uh, with work and--and things.” 

He winces slightly at himself, as if embarrassed by the comment, and Chanyeol wants to ask him about so many things; is Monggu okay, did he find a dance studio where he could practice, has his mother stopped calling to check if he’s surviving in the city, did he ever get back his copy of Attack on Titan from Sehun because they’d talked about it watching it before--

None of those things seem to come out in time, and Jongin is mumbling out an awkward goodbye before he quickly leaves the office, the door shutting behind him. Chanyeol stares at it, as if Jongin will magically change his mind and reappear, but seconds pass and nothing. All Chanyeol has is his burning wrist and a disappointment that seems to crush his heart. 

“Hey,” says Kyungsoo, his voice soft and concerned, pulling Chanyeol back from this precipice of longing and sadness. Familiar fingers slide down his arm and link with his own, and Kyungsoo is there beside him, gazing up at him with worry etched into his handsome features. “You okay?” 

“Yeah,” Chanyeol says, feeling all the breath in his lungs leave him at once. He pushes Jongin out of his mind. “Yeah, sorry,” he adds, doing his best to perk up. He puts on a smile and holds out the bag clutched in his other hand. “I hope you’re hungry.” 

Chanyeol tugs out of Kyungsoo’s hold to start pulling out containers from the bag across Kyungsoo’s desk. He’s still reeling a little from seeing Jongin like this, from how easily he’d been laughing and talking with Kyungsoo when he walked in. He’s not sure what he’s feeling but he doesn’t like it, and he just wants to distract himself, focusing so intently on the food that he doesn’t even realize Kyungsoo’s walked back around until he says, “Chanyeol, we should talk about this.” 

“What’s there to talk about?” he says, glancing up at Kyungsoo, then back down to the food. The tupperware cracks as he opens the lid off one, and he goes for another. 

“It’s the first time you’ve seen him since…” Kyungsoo says. “If I’d known you’d be coming, I could have--” 

“You don’t need to protect me like that, Kyungsoo,” Chanyeol laughs, but it sounds hollow to his own ears. He looks at him, finally, at his furrowed brows, the downward turn of his full lips. “I didn’t even know you were so close to him.” 

“We’re working on a project together,” Kyungsoo says. “I was just reviewing some of his work.”

“It didn’t seem like--” 

“What?” Kyungsoo cuts over him, crossing his arms over his chest and raising a brow at Chanyeol expectantly. “What do you think is going on?”

“Nothing!” Chanyeol says quickly, because he knows better than that, even if his mind is trying to trick him, make it seem like something is there when it isn’t. He’s just still so surprised, that the moment Jongin pulls away from Chanyeol, it seems like he’s become closer to Kyungsoo, and Chanyeol...Chanyeol doesn’t like how it feels. “Nothing,” he says again, less frantic, more honest. “I was really just surprised. He was smiling--he looked fine, like--” Like he doesn’t even miss Chanyeol, like nothing was wrong. 

Kyungsoo sighs, lowering his arms to reach out and take the container in Chanyeol’s hands, cracking open the lid and setting it aside. “Look,” he says softly, digging around in the bag for chopsticks. “I wasn’t trying to hide anything from you. It’s just that, after that other day, when I brought up talking with Jongin here, you looked so upset.” Kyungsoo holds out the second pair of chopsticks for Chanyeol, and his eyes are a little sad when Chanyeol properly looks at him. “I didn’t want to make you more upset.” 

He feels a little guilty now, for acting like this, and thinking these stupid things. “I’m sorry,” he mutters, taking the chopsticks from Kyungsoo but twisting his fingers to grasp Kyungsoo’s hand in his, squeezing slightly. “I didn’t mean anything by it, just that--” 

“After everything, the way _I_ acted, seeing us get along is weird, right?” Kyungsoo guesses and when Chanyeol nods sheepishly, Kyungsoo smiles. It’s a little tired, but it’s still a smile, and it makes Chanyeol relax considerably. He releases Kyungsoo’s hand and pulls one of the chairs in front of his desk closer to sit down. “I get it,” Kyungsoo says, as he sits, too. “And it’s not like we’re suddenly friends or anything, Chanyeol, but we’ve spent some time together and I realized I might’ve…” 

“Jumped to hating him a little too soon?” Chanyeol finishes, lips tugging into a grin and Kyungsoo lets out a huff of a laugh as he slumps back in his seat. 

“I didn’t _hate_ him,” he refutes, lower lip jutting out in a rare pout, “but yes. That.” He settles back in his seat, holding one of the containers and popping a piece of meat into his mouth. “Chanyeol,” he says after a moment, and Chanyeol abandons trying to separate a clump of noodles to look at him. “Are you sure you’re all right? I know you weren’t expecting to see Jongin today.” 

Chanyeol sighs, setting his chopsticks down to rest atop of another container. “I’m kind of glad I got to see him, actually,” he says, and as he does he realizes it’s the truth. He’s spent this whole time wondering what Jongin is feeling, how he’s doing, and especially after his conversation with Baekhyun, hoping that he was okay and not hurting because of the distance between his bonds. Sure, Jongin didn’t try to fix anything, didn’t blurt out an apology and tell Chanyeol he missed him, but just seeing him, being in the same space as him, has settled some of that worry in Chanyeol’s heart. “Honestly, I think he looked more shocked to see me.” 

“Just a little,” Kyungsoo laughs. “I think--I think he misses you. I know you do.” 

“Kyungsoo--” 

“It’s okay,” he cuts in, smiling. “I don’t want you to pretend. That’s what we talked about, right?” 

Chanyeol swallows thickly but nods. “Right,” he agrees, smiling back. “It’s just that...everything feels so unfinished, you know? I thought, even if things didn’t work out entirely, we could be friends. But, clearly he doesn’t want anything to do with me--with us.” 

“I don’t think that’s true,” Kyungsoo says, setting his food down on his desk. “I think he’s scared, the way we’re scared. And this is just the only way he knew how to deal with it.” 

“You think he might change his mind?” Chanyeol asks and doesn’t bother hiding the hope in his voice. Hearing this from Kyungsoo is more uplifting than anything he’s wished for himself the past week. 

“I don’t know him well enough to say for sure,” Kyungsoo admits, but he nods after a moment of thought. “I think he could, but only if you--if _we_ \--help him realize that it’s okay. Not just for you, but I think for me, too.” 

“Is it?” Chanyeol says tentatively, unsure if this is pushing at the topic too soon. They still haven’t really talked about it, Kyungsoo being one of Jongin’s soulmates, too. It’s just been an accepted fact, but not anything they’ve had a chance to dwell on, a chance to evolve. At least, not until Kyungsoo decided he wanted to reach out to Jongin on his own.

Kyungsoo licks his lips, taking the time to pull together the right words, and Chanyeol picks up his chopsticks again, focusing on his food so he doesn’t put extra pressure on Kyungsoo to answer. It takes a minute, and he reaches out to touch Chanyeol’s left wrist lightly, their bond heating up gently under his skin. “I don’t know,” he answers softly, when Chanyeol looks up at him, “but I’m starting to think it might be.” 

“Really?” Chanyeol says and smiles a little sheepishly at the hopeful tone in his voice. Kyungsoo doesn’t seem to mind, smiling back. 

“I just know that the way we have been doing things hasn’t exactly worked out,” he says, pulling his hand back from Chanyeol’s wrist and picking up his food again. He pops some rice into his mouth and chews thoughtfully, continues after he’s swallowed, “It wasn’t right, what I did, making you go through all this alone, making Jongin get to learn so much about you but keep him from even properly meeting me.” 

“What’s done is done,” Chanyeol says, not wanting Kyungsoo to regret what’s happened even more. “All we can do now is figure out how to fix it.” 

“You want to fix it?” Kyungsoo asks, and it’s a serious question. It’s what Chanyeol’s been asking himself ever since Jongin broke things off. It’s what’s been eating away at him for days, his own uncertainties rivaling the anger from his bond, reminding him that yes, this really is more important than that. This is him, struggling to accept the fact that maybe he really does want Jongin in his life. “Look, Chanyeol,” Kyungsoo continues when Chanyeol doesn’t answer, “I don’t know if you’re holding back because of me or if you feel guilty, or both, but...you like Jongin.” 

That’s not what Chanyeol was expecting him to say, and he almost drops his chopsticks to the floor in surprise. Kyungsoo laughs a little at the look on his face and adds, “Are you surprised that I can tell? I’m not saying that you’re in love with him, but it’s been obvious for some time that you do really like him, especially after what happened between the two of you.” 

Chanyeol bites his lower lip, setting his food down and staring helplessly at Kyungsoo, who surprisingly has a fond look in his eyes. He’s not mad, Chanyeol realizes. He’s just stating the facts, in a very Kyungsoo-like way. Chanyeol is still a little off-balance by the sudden twist to this conversation, but he relaxes when Kyungsoo sets aside his own food in favor of walking around his desk and climbing right into Chanyeol’s lap, knees snug on either side of Chanyeol’s thighs. 

“Don’t make that face,” he murmurs, pinching Chanyeol’s cheek. Chanyeol pouts at him, hands resting on Kyungsoo’s hips, and it’s a tight little fit in the armchair, but this closeness makes his bond sing, and it’s comforting in the face of this conversation. 

“What face?” he says. 

“Your kicked puppy face,” Kyungsoo elaborates. “I’m not trying to attack you. I’ve been thinking about this a lot.” He smoothes his thumb over the space he pinched, drags his fingers slowly down Chanyeol’s jaw. “I know you like him a lot, why do you think I got so--well, you know,” he says pointedly, and this time Chanyeol pinches Kyungsoo’s cheek to get him to stop looking so serious.

Kyungsoo narrows his eyes at him, but then laughs, and the tension that had taken place in Chanyeol’s shoulders starts to melt away. “Anyway, it just feels like you like Jongin enough that if we weren't already soulmates and you had met Jongin under other circumstances that you might have asked him out, or at least, said yes if he did.”

Chanyeol isn’t sure what to say to that, so he keeps quiet. The thing is, as Kyungsoo’s words settle inside of him, he realizes he’s not really wrong. It’s something he’d thought himself, at least once, while he was getting to know Jongin, who is very much his type. Cute and passionate and someone Chanyeol can so easily take care of, but knows how to take care of himself, too. 

“And I know he likes you,” Kyungsoo says, pulling Chanyeol out of his thoughts as he continues tracing his fingertips down Chanyeol’s neck and lets his hand rest on his left shoulder. “Honestly, I think--I think he might be a little in love,” he adds, meeting Chanyeol’s eyes, and Chanyeol hasn’t forgotten the little slip up in Jongin’s speech the day he ended everything. He thinks about it a lot. “Or, well, loves you enough to take himself out of the picture because he knows how much you love me.” 

“Stupid,” Chanyeol mumbles under his breath. 

“Well, yes,” Kyungsoo laughs quietly, “it wasn’t the best thing to do for either of you, but that doesn’t mean it’s the end. You’ve only just met.” He pauses for a moment, adds, “ _I’ve_ only started to get to know him, too. And I realize now, that we should have done that together.” 

“I think we’ve all made some mistakes,” Chanyeol agrees. “This...it’s still so hard to figure out.” 

“But you want to, right?” Kyungsoo asks, eyeing Chanyeol closely as he smoothes out the collar of Chanyeol’s shirt. “You want to fix it?” 

This time he doesn’t have to hesitate as much. This time, he can tell Kyungsoo is looking for the truth, because he wants to know how to help, how to, hopefully, do this together. Do it right. And Chanyeol has no idea where it will go, but he knows, more now than ever after seeing Jongin again today, that he can’t let this distance between them drag on any further. 

“Yes,” he answers Kyungsoo honestly, and it feels right. He wants to see Jongin again, wants to spend time with him, hear him laugh, and maybe, perhaps, even hold his hand again. He wants Kyungsoo to be there, too, be the support he didn’t have the first time around and see them become friends, too. “I don’t want to give up yet.” 

“Okay,” Kyungsoo says softly, and his fingers curl around Chanyeol’s jaw, holding him in place as he kisses him. “Then we’ll fix it,” he says, and Chanyeol looks into Kyungsoo’s eyes and believes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. they're on the same page fiNALLY amirite lol 
> 
> 2\. there will be more jongin in the next chapter! which will probably also be the last update as that's all that i have written sobs i didn't think i'd get through all of that so quickly T_T but i will definitely be continuing this, once i finish the xiubaekchen fic i'm working on which should be soon. your comments have given me a lot to think about and consider for this verse and definitely made me excited about writing this fic again. i really can't thank you enough. ❤
> 
> 3\. hope u enjoyed this chapter!! see u next week :D
> 
> come say hi on [twitter](http://twitter.com/xingkais) | [ask.fm](http://ask.fm/koiyake) | [tumblr](http://koiyake.tumblr.com)


	8. Chapter 8

“I know you always say you’re busy, but I think you just don’t want to see us,” Chanyeol’s mother says when Chanyeol stops by to visit a couple of days later. His parents run a small Korean-style cafe that always seems to be packed whenever Chanyeol comes over, and no matter how much he offers to help, his mother pushes him down to sit at one of the counter stools and says he’d only get in the way with his uncoordinated limbs. Chanyeol thinks it’s mostly because she’d rather have the chance to interrogate him, but even that doesn’t bother him. There isn’t much he keeps from her. 

“I talk to you almost everyday,” Chanyeol says. “And _you’re_ the one who’s always busy.” He gestures around the place. “Everything is going well, I take it.” 

“Much better than last year,” his mother says, beaming. “The new marketing plans Kyungsoo helped with have really paid off.” She wipes her hands off on a dish towel and glances toward the clock on the wall behind her. “Speaking of--where is Kyungsoo?” 

“He said he’s on his way, just got caught up in a last-minute meeting,” Chanyeol says, remembering the text Kyungsoo had sent off about a half hour ago, just when Chanyeol was expecting him to barge through the door at their apartment. “If you want to talk about busy, Kyungsoo’s the one who barely leaves the office.” 

His mother purses her lips, looking decidedly unpleased about this fact. It’s the sort of face she used to make when Chanyeol was still in school, spending weekends hunched over textbooks instead of enjoying time with her whenever he came home to visit. She makes the same face at Yura over family dinners when Yura discusses her long hours and endless list of clients. 

“You two should go on a holiday,” she says, shaking her head. “Taking some time off is a good thing.” 

Chanyeol smiles, thinks back to the last time he and Kyungsoo took a vacation; they’d visited Seungsoo last summer after his second son was born, but it’d been for the weekend and they hadn’t had much of an opportunity to explore Seattle as they’d have liked. “A vacation sounds nice,” Chanyeol says, “but it’s probably not the best idea right now.” He turns his hand over to stare at his right wrist and sighs. 

His mother catches where he’s looking and reaches over the counter to pat his hand consoling. “Are you okay?” she asks him, her gaze soft and knowing. Chanyeol’s told her more or less everything there is to know about Jongin and about everything that happened with Kyungsoo, too. She’s been supportive of Jongin from the start, offering the kind of advice that doesn’t really give Chanyeol any direction but manages to comfort him all the same. Both his parents have full belief in the way soul bonds work; they’ve been bonded since high school, and they do their best to let not only Chanyeol, but Yura as well, find their own paths when it comes to their bonds. 

Chanyeol rubs his thumb over Jongin’s name, then tucks his hand down under the counter so he won’t have to look at it. “I’m better,” he says, and he is. The conversation he had with Kyungsoo the other day has made things clearer. They have an understanding now, that they hadn’t really come to terms with before, and even though Chanyeol doesn’t know when he’ll be able to talk to Jongin again, or if he’ll be able to at all, he doesn’t feel quite as hopeless as he did when Jongin broke everything off. 

“Trust in your soul bond, Chanyeol,” she says, smiling, “but don’t forget to trust in yourself, too.” She sets down a plate of mandu in front of him and winks, before disappearing into the back, shouting out for her husband. 

Chanyeol’s finished off half the plate when Kyungsoo wanders in, sliding a hand around the back of Chanyeol’s neck and pressing a kiss to the corner of his mouth. “Hey, sorry I’m late,” he says, settling into the stool on Chanyeol’s right and shrugging out of his coat. “You didn’t eat without me, did you?” 

“I’m not Baekhyun,” Chanyeol laughs, grinning when Kyungsoo rolls his eyes but can’t hide his own smile. He pushes the plate over to Kyungsoo, slips out of his seat and around the counter to get Kyungsoo a beer from the fridge. Chanyeol’s mother comes barrelling back seconds later, as if she could tell he was snooping around and shoos him out with her dish towel, Chanyeol laughing harder for it, and drawing attention from some of the other guests in the shop. 

Kyungsoo yanks him down to sit again and says, “Don’t make a scene,” and before Chanyeol can protest, he shoves half a piece of mandu into his mouth. 

Chanyeol dutifully shuts up, chewing happily on the food, and carefully tugs Kyungsoo’s stool over a little so they can sit closer and Chanyeol doesn’t have to strain his neck to see what Kyungsoo’s typing into his phone. 

“Nosy,” Kyungsoo says, giving Chanyeol a little look, but it morphs into a smile when Chanyeol pouts at him, hooks his chin on his shoulder. “It’s just Baekhyun, whining about his soulmate troubles.”

Laughing softly, Chanyeol pulls back. “We all seem to be having a bit of that lately, huh?” 

Kyungsoo makes a low humming sound, finishing his reply to Baekhyun before setting his phone aside, face down on the counter. He turns to Chanyeol and slides his left hand down Chanyeol’s thigh. “I think the two of us are doing all right, despite everything, don’t you think?” 

Chanyeol nods and Kyungsoo rewards him with a kiss, grinning into it as he pulls back. “Good,” Kyungsoo says, patting his thigh. “So, what do you want to order?”

-

“How was Bora Bora, did you guys ever leave your hotel room?” Chanyeol asks, speaking a little louder over the sound of lively jazz music. 

“Minseok made us,” Han says, a hint of a whine in his voice. “I’d have been perfectly content spending the whole time in bed.” 

Minseok, sitting to Chanyeol’s left, rolls his eyes. “Of course you would have,” he says. “We almost did leave him in the room a few times, but then he came running after yelling about being left alone on his own honeymoon.” 

Chanyeol laughs, easily picturing this as he raises his glass to his lips, only to remember it’s empty and only a few slivers of ice remain. He sets it back down, glances over his shoulder to see what’s holding Yixing up from getting their next round, but he can barely make him out from the crowd that’s spilling into the bar. Chanyeol hasn’t been here in a while, but when Yixing texted him demanding to meet up, he couldn’t refuse. He hasn’t seen any of them since they left on their trip and Chanyeol could use with a night out hustling Han at a game of pool. 

Kyungsoo’s supposed to join them, and probably Junmyeon, too, once they wrap up their late night at the office. Chanyeol tries not to glance at the door too often, hoping to catch sight of his boyfriend, especially after Minseok had called him out on it. Thankfully Yixing shows up back at their table then, distracting Chanyeol by handing him a beer and slipping into the seat next to Han, nudging him with his elbow as he settles but then leaning in to kiss his cheek when Han complains. Han melts almost instantly at the affection, a wide smile spreading across his face, and he winds an arm around Yixing’s shoulders as he raises his drink to his lips. 

Chanyeol looks at them, at the fondness in Minseok’s eyes from where he’s watching them from across the table, and feels a little jealousy, maybe, stirring in his heart. He wonders if maybe someday, things could be as simple and wonderful for him and his two soulmates, the way they are for the three of them. He knows it wasn’t easy, remembers how Yixing would drag him out to play at clubs on weekends to get away from Minseok and Han, how Minseok would end up at their apartment, cooking dinner with Kyungsoo and wondering if he could really do this, when his wrists remained bare and Yixing’s and Han’s names on each other’s only seemed to grow brighter. Somehow, though, they’d gotten through all of that, and they’re happy, Chanyeol can see that clearly in their shared smiles, the warmth in their eyes. They just had a honeymoon, after all, and it’s like they’re more in love now than they’d ever been before and Chanyeol wouldn’t have thought that possible if he wasn’t witness to it himself. 

As Chanyeol watches Yixing and Han bicker and Minseok joining in at moments to tease one of them, more comfortable with just watching than actively participating, Chanyeol thinks about maybe talking to them about it. Minseok had asked when Chanyeol arrived, how things were going, that he’d heard from Kyungsoo about what had happened. “If you want need more advice--well, I’m not sure how much help we’ll be, but you know we’re here,” he said, patting Chanyeol’s shoulder when Chanyeol just nodded and thanked him. 

He knows they’d be willing to listen but Chanyeol’s not sure he’s drunk enough for this conversation. He’s not really sure where he’d even begin. Instead, he takes a big gulp of his beer and stands, waving at Han when they all look up at him. “Come on, let’s play a round. Maybe you’ll finally be able to beat me for once.” 

“Don’t cry when I do,” Han bites back, easily taking the bait and following Chanyeol over to the other end of the room, where a couple of pool tables are set up for use. There’s one open in the corner and Chanyeol starts pulling up the balls from the pockets and into the triangle rack. Han grabs them cues from the back wall and starts buffing one with the chalk. 

They play rock, paper, scissors to see who goes first, and Chanyeol wins but lets Han break. No matter how much Han talks, they both know that Chanyeol is the better player and Chanyeol’s confident enough to take back any lead Han might make. He watches as Han sinks in the two-ball on the break and goes for the four-ball into the center pocket but misses. Chanyeol laughs and Han shoots him a glare, picking up his beer bottle from where he’d set it onto the ledge of the table and takes a pouty drink as Chanyeol scours the positions of the balls to determine his first move. 

They’re maybe halfway through the game when Kyungsoo shows up, familiar hand sliding around Chanyeol’s waist, startling Chanyeol from where he’s leaning over the table, poised to shoot. “Hi,” Kyungsoo says softly and Chanyeol glances up at him without moving, grins, and then focuses back on the game. He waits a moment, grips his cue more firmly, and then takes the shot. The blue-striped ten-ball smoothly rolls into the corner pocket, the cue-ball rolling off to the side, giving Chanyeol a decent chance at the fifteen. He stands up straight, Kyungsoo’s arm still around his waist, and turns to properly greet him, smiling as he bends to kiss him so Kyungsoo doesn’t have to lean up. 

“Are you winning?” Kyungsoo asks when they part, fingers squeezing at his side. 

“Of course I am,” Chanyeol says, smug, and Kyungsoo smirks back, pats his butt lightly as he steps away to let him play. 

“Good,” he says, “beat his ass.” 

“Hey!” Han exclaims from the other side of the table, and the laugh about to bubble from Chanyeol’s throat as he turns to him becomes a surprised cough because there, standing beside Han is the last person Chanyeol expected to see. 

“What--” Chanyeol chokes out, struggling to catch his breath, looking back at Kyungsoo with wide, questioning eyes. 

“He wanted to come,” Kyungsoo says quietly. His left hand curls around Chanyeol’s right, where Jongin’s name is starting to burn against his skin. “I asked him,” he continues, “even told him you’d be here, and he still said yes.” He squeezes Chanyeol’s fingers. “So breathe, it’s okay. And stop making that face, you look ridiculous.” 

“I’m not--” he says instantly and pouts when Kyungsoo laughs at him, but the burgeoning anxiety that’d hit him earlier when he saw Jongin there is fading now, as he properly digests Kyungsoo’s words. He swallows thickly and takes that breath, smiles down at Kyungsoo when he gently rubs his thumb over his knuckles. Then, he turns back to Jongin, ignoring the amused look that Han is giving all of them as he sips at his drink, says, “Hey Jongin, do you know how to play pool?” 

The stiffness in Jongin’s shoulders, the uncertainty in his eyes--it disappears easily in that next second as he lets out a tiny breath and breaks out into one of those smiles Chanyeol has so missed. It’s a little hesitant, sure, but still it’s a smile, and not that horrified look he’d given Chanyeol the last time they’d met. “No,” he says as he shuffles closer, tugging at the sleeves of his long-sleeved shirt so they cover his fingers. 

Kyungsoo pats Chanyeol’s arm and says, “I’ll go get us drinks, okay? Junmyeon is around here somewhere, too, if you want to say hi.” 

“Once I finish this game,” Chanyeol says, and Kyungsoo nods, stopping to chat with Jongin and then Han for a moment before he heads back up towards the bar. With him gone, Chanyeol feels some of that unease coming back, but he squares his shoulders and sucks it up. Jongin came because he wanted to. Chanyeol isn’t going to make him regret that decision. He waves Jongin over and introduces him to Han, who grins at him easily in that way that makes everyone fall for him, and reaches over the pool table to shake Jongin’s hand. Han, however, has never been discreet, and Chanyeol catches the way he tries to knock one of his own balls into the corner pocket when he retreats and Chanyeol yells, “You cheat! Put it back!” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Han says, turning away, but winking at Jongin, who looks between the two of them and laughs, hiding his mouth behind his hand. Finally, he’s relaxed, Chanyeol can see it in the brightness of his eyes, and it makes him calm down, too. This is okay. This is good. 

“Fine, whatever,” Chanyeol says with a roll of his eyes, though he can’t stop the smile tugging at his lips. Han is ridiculous but he never makes a game boring. “Guess it’s still your turn then.” 

As Han prepares to shoot again, Chanyeol glances at Jongin and says, “You’ve never played before?” 

Jongin shakes his head. “I’ve watched Taemin and Sehun play but...other than just trying to get the balls into the pocket things, I don’t really know much about it,” he says. 

“It’s not that hard,” Chanyeol says, and he gives Jongin a little runthrough of the rules as Han takes his turn. “There are a lot of variations in how to play, but for what we’re playing, whoever sinks the eight-ball, wins.” He surveys the table and smirks at Jongin, “Which apparently will be me.” 

“Hey, you don’t know that yet,” Han says, even as he frowns down at where the balls have lined up, giving Chanyeol easy access to his last two remaining stripes. The eight-ball is hiding behind one of Han’s, but Chanyeol could probably get to it, depending on where his cue-ball ends up. 

“Watch and learn,” Chanyeol says to Jongin, who meets his eyes with an amused little smile on his lips, and Chanyeol circles the table as he figures out exactly what his next move will be. He sinks his remaining balls easily, laughing at Han’s groan as he assesses the table for what will hopefully be his winning shot. Han still has one remaining ball on the table before he’s onto the eight, so this is Chanyeol’s best bet to win before Han catches up to him. 

Chanyeol takes a deep breath before he lines up and finally takes the shot, watches as the cue ball spins out across the table and hits the eight-ball dead on. He doesn’t move until the black ball sinks into the pocket to the left and then he laughs loudly, raising a fist in success, while Han mumbles out profanities from the other side of the table. 

“And that’s how you win,” Chanyeol says brightly to Jongin, ignoring Han’s coughed, “Show off.” 

“Maybe you were just lucky,” Jongin says and as Chanyeol splutters, not expecting that reaction, Jongin grins, his eyes gleaming in mischief. He bursts out into laughter when Han pops up beside him, grabbing his hands to shake them forcefully as he thanks Jongin for his comment, as if he was a politician that just delivered a prominent speech and shot down his opponent in the process. Chanyeol just rolls his eyes at them, not really all that offended, and starts to pull out the balls from the pockets around the table. 

By the time Chanyeol’s cleaned up, Kyungsoo’s wandered back over holding two glasses in his hands, one which he passes off to Jongin and the other that he holds out for Chanyeol. “Did you win?” he asks, before he lets Chanyeol take it from him, and when Chanyeol nods eagerly, he hands it over. “Are you gonna play another?” 

“Maybe in a bit,” Chanyeol says, “Give Han a chance to recover from the loss--and buy us all a round.” 

Han groans loudly, but doesn’t seem as put upon when Chanyeol claps him on the back goodnaturedly. 

They join the others back at the table, and maybe Kyungsoo gave them a quick runthrough of the situation because none of them blink when Chanyeol introduces Jongin. Even Han, who sometimes doesn’t think before he speaks, doesn’t say anything ridiculous just smiles at Jongin from across the table as Jongin settles in on Chanyeol’s right. 

“It’s good to finally meet you,” Minseok says, reaching across the table to shake Jongin’s hand. “I hear you just saw Han lose to Chanyeol again.” 

“Do you have to bring that up?” Han grumbles, slouching in his seat and pouting even as Yixing ruffles his hair. “I don’t play enough to be good enough to beat him.” 

“Maybe if you’d just win _one_ match, I’d let it go,” Minseok laughs, and Yixing smirks beside him, adds, “Seriously, Han, how many losses does this make? A hundred?” 

“Shut up!” Han exclaims, jerking away from Yixing, but not getting very far because Yixing easily pulls him back, and Han’s clearly not annoyed enough to protest. “What kind of boyfriends are you?” 

Jongin’s eyes widen as he looks between the three of them, and Chanyeol watches with slight trepidation as he asks, “Wait, the three of you are--” 

“Soulmates?” Yixing says, eyes soft as he turns to Jongin, fingers back in Han’s hair and dimple pressed in his cheek. “Yes, we are.”

“Well, not me, technically,” Minseok adds, not even hesitating to show Jongin his bare wrists. 

“Fuck that,” Han says, reaching over Yixing to grab Minseok’s left hand. “You’re still our soulmate.”

Minseok and Yixing share a look, and simultaneously they turn to Han to coo at him, crowding over each other to pinch his cheeks as Han struggles and fails to escape. “Aren’t you cute?” Minseok laughs as Yixing kisses the disgruntled look off his face. He doesn’t look too upset about it when they part though, cheeks flushed and a smile tugging at his lips, and he picks up his drink to sip quietly. 

“The three of them have been together for a long time,” Chanyeol says, finally jumping in, and Jongin turns to him quickly, surprised, like he maybe forgot Chanyeol was even there. Chanyeol tries not to think too much on that, just smiles at him and adds, “They’re lucky.”

“Luck doesn’t have anything to do with it, not really,” Han chides. 

“You all found each other,” Jongin says. “It sounds pretty lucky to me.” When they glance at each other and then back to Jongin, little amused smiles on their faces, Jongin grows flustered and waves a hand. “Or, well, I just think it’s nice, that’s all.” 

“Chanyeol was right,” Yixing says, leaning closer, elbow on the table. “You are cute.” 

Now Chanyeol feels his face grow hot, but he doesn’t look away when Jongin turns to him. He wants him to know it’s true. There’s surprise in Jongin’s eyes, and maybe what Chanyeol thinks is that lingering uncertainty, but then he smiles, and Chanyeol can breathe easily again. As Jongin turns back to talk with Yixing, who seems to have taken an interest in him, Chanyeol downs the rest of his drink and shuffles out of his chair to head back up to the bar. Junmyeon comes with him, and they stand around at the counter, catching up. It’s been awhile since Chanyeol’s really seen him, so when Junmyeon suggests another game of pool, Chanyeol readily says yes. 

“Do you want to play?” Chanyeol asks Jongin when they return to the table to let everyone know where they’re headed. “We could play teams.” 

Jongin glances at Yixing who he’s still been talking to, then back at Chanyeol, considering. “Sure,” he says after a moment, standing. “As long as you help me out.” 

“Of course,” Chanyeol says easily, grinning at him, pleased. 

“Yixing, you want to join me, then?” Junmyeon asks, looking at him hopefully, but Yixing’s already up on his feet, too, wrapping an arm around Junmyeon’s shoulders. 

“Let’s take them,” he says brightly and Chanyeol laughs, pleased by the enthusiasm. Yixing’s a decent player, too, definitely better than Han, so this round might not be as simple as before. 

Kyungsoo waves Chanyeol and Jongin off easily, when Chanyeol turns to him to ask if he wants to watch, saying that he’ll keep Minseok and Han company, so Chanyeol follows Yixing back toward the pool tables, Jongin falling into step beside him. There’s the niggling urge to reach out and take Jongin’s hand, but instead, Chanyeol shoves it into his pocket, wrist aching, and asks Jongin quietly, “How’ve you been doing lately?” 

“Good,” Jongin says, and Chanyeol’s glad to see he’s not hesitating or worrying before answering. “I’ve been good. Just working a lot, I guess.”

“What’ve you been working on?” Chanyeol says as he passes Jongin a cue and the chalk to prep it. Jongin looks a little lost with it, so Chanyeol shows him what to do with his own cue before handing it back. 

“I have to do a piece on the best music venues in the city,” Jongin says and as he talks, his face lights up, his eyes sparkling. Chanyeol’s always liked how excited he gets about his work, about things he likes. “From the perspective of a non-native New Yorker.” 

“Is that why you came out today?” Chanyeol asks carefully, not wanting to pressure him into answering this, especially. But he’s curious--he wants to know. Did Jongin want to see him? 

“For the most part, yes,” Jongin admits, smiling a little, even though he’s watching as Junmyeon breaks. “The other part?” He glances at Chanyeol, “I did want to see you again.” 

It’s something so simple, so little, but Chanyeol feels like all the deadweight he’s been carrying around for the past two? weeks has instantly vanished. Nothing has resolved itself between them, and Chanyeol isn’t sure what this means for them either, but just knowing that Jongin is here because he truly wants to be, because he actually wanted to see Chanyeol. 

“I...I really wanted to see you again, too,” Chanyeol says honestly, and Jongin looks at him, really looks at him, before he smiles, pleased and relieved, maybe. Before Chanyeol can say anything more, Yixing is calling out to them, “Didn’t you want to play? Stop flirting and take your turn already!” and the moment passes, Chanyeol almost dropping his cue in surprise as Jongin turns away, an embarrassed flush on his face. 

The rest of the night passes by in a blur of laughter, Junmyeon’s steadily worsening pool skills, rounds of beer and Jongin’s pretty smile. Chanyeol teaches him the best way to hold his cue during his turns, cheers loudly when he manages to make his first goal, and watches on as Yixing seems to adopt Jongin under his wing, talking with him in hushed tones whenever it’s Junmyeon or Chanyeol’s turn after discovering a shared interest in dance. The others wander down to join them towards the end of the game, Kyungsoo’s hand on the small of Chanyeol’s back warm and comforting as he takes another shot and easily sinks the last ball on the table before the eighth. 

“You go for it,” he tells Jongin, waving a hand at the eight-ball and laughing at the panicked look on Jongin’s face. “Don’t look so scared, it’s fine. You’ve been playing really well.” He grins. “I’d say you’re a natural.” 

Jongin eyes him for a moment, then pouts. “I can’t tell if you’re teasing me or not.” 

“Chanyeol never jokes about billiards,” Kyungsoo says, amused. He gives Jongin a gentle little push toward the table. “Go ahead, Jongin.” 

Jongin licks his lips, glancing between the two of them, but then smiles, squaring his shoulders resolutely as he turns back to the table and gets ready to shoot. Kyungsoo reaches out to adjust his stance, and both of Chanyeol’s wrists burn pleasantly as he watches them, and unbidden smile tugging at his lips. Jongin grins at him once over his shoulder before he focuses his attention over to the game again and while Kyungsoo is right that Chanyeol takes pool very seriously, right now he almost doesn’t care if they end up losing. Just being here, spending the evening with not only Kyungsoo, but Jongin, too, it’s almost surreal. It’s everything he didn’t know he wanted--needed--until right now, and it means more to him than any game. 

As it is, Jongin does make the shot, and the eight-ball spins right into the center pocket on the right side of the table. There’s a moment of silence as it sinks in, and then Yixing is clapping, breaking the spell and Jongin is turning around to gape at Chanyeol in surprise, like he never once believed he could actually make it. “We won?” he asks, still looking dumbfounded, and Kyungsoo laughs beside him as Chanyeol itches to pull Jongin into a celebratory hug or reach out and ruffle his hair--something. 

Instead he beams at him and nods. “You did it!” he says, grinning wider as Jongin’s surprise dies down and he looks proud, pleased. “Like I said, you’re a natural.” 

“You are,” Yixing says as he joins them, easily sliding an arm around Jongin’s shoulders and patting him in congratulations. Chanyeol only feels a little pang of jealousy at how Yixing can do that without even thinking about it, and pushes the unease aside as soon as it comes because it’s stupid. Yixing’s always been touchy and he’s not one of Jongin’s soulmates that Jongin tried to push away. “We’ll have to play again sometime. Mind giving me your number so I can reach you?” 

“Sure,” Jongin says, smiling softly as he sets the cue against the pool table and pulls his phone from the back pocket of his jeans. “You’ll have to text me the name of that dance studio you talked about earlier, too, okay?” 

Chanyeol leaves them to it, helps Junmyeon clean up the table, and it isn’t long after that they all stumble back out into the chilly night air. Minseok and Yixing have to drag a very drunk Lu Han down the street with waved goodbyes and Junmyeon heads off into the opposite direction as Kyungsoo flags down a cab. It seems obvious to let Jongin climb in with them, as his place is on the way to their own, and Chanyeol sits cramped in the middle of the backseat, trying not to let the heat of Jongin’s thigh pressed up against his distract him too much. Kyungsoo, sitting on Chanyeol’s left, must sense his discomfort, his uncertainty, because he places a hand on Chanyeol’s knee and squeezes, without ever looking up from where he’s scanning through emails on his phone. 

It’s Kyungsoo, too, who surprises not just Jongin, but Chanyeol as well, when he says, “Maybe we can do this again?” once the cab stops at the curb in front of Jongin’s apartment building. 

Jongin, halfway out of the cab, opens his mouth in shock but nothing comes out. Chanyeol is watching Kyungsoo in wonder because even though they talked about this, even though they decided they wanted to fix it, he didn’t think Kyungsoo would try this hard. “Just the three of us, next time,” Kyungsoo adds, looking straight at Jongin. His hand on Chanyeol’s knee is still warm and comforting, and it gives Chanyeol the courage to turn too, and say, “Only if you want to, of course.” 

Jongin swallows. There’s confusion in his eyes, but maybe something a little like hope, too. He steps out of the car fully and says, “I’d like that.” Then, he picks out a few bills from his wallet to cover his half of the ride, passing them to the cabbie and ignoring Chanyeol’s quick insistence that it’s okay, and smiles at the two of them one last time. “I’ll...see you, then,” he says, before he disappears inside, and Chanyeol slumps back in his seat as Kyungsoo gives the cabbie their address. 

“Hey,” Kyungsoo says as he settles back, too, his hand sliding up Chanyeol’s thigh to find his hand instead, lacing their fingers together. “You okay?” 

Chanyeol isn’t really sure; he’s happy, hopeful, but a little scared, too. Jongin agreed to seeing them again. The both of them. It’ll be the first time the three of them have been together since they first met, and Chanyeol isn’t sure what’s going to happen. He sighs, slipping down in his seat enough so he can rest his head on Kyungsoo’s shoulder. It’s a little uncomfortable because the cab isn’t big enough to accommodate his legs, but it makes him feel better. 

“I will be,” he says. “Are you?” 

“Yes,” Kyungsoo says and he definitely sounds much more confident than Chanyeol feels. “Tonight was good, right?” 

“It was,” Chanyeol agrees, because that much is true. “Everything will work out, won’t it?” 

“We just have to wait and see,” Kyungsoo says sagely, giving Chanyeol’s fingers a little squeeze as Chanyeol closes his eyes, shifts a little to get more comfortable on his shoulder-pillow. “But for the first time, I have hope.” 

Chanyeol remembers the hope he saw in Jongin’s eyes earlier, the hope that burns inside of them just as strong as his wrists sing pleasantly warm from having been with both his soulmates for the first time in so long. “Hope is good,” he whispers, and smiles when Kyungsoo presses a soft kiss to his forehead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. the end
> 
> 2\. lol no im kidding but this is the end...for the foreseeable future...until i finally get to writing more. T__T thank you for sticking with this and for all your support. honestly i was not expecting such a positive reaction to this either sobs so seriously. i can't say thank you enough. i really hope i'll be able to continue this soon. please be patient with me ;_; 
> 
> 3\. happy holidays! ❤


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